


A Different Kind of Dream

by cosmicwriter



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-02
Updated: 2017-10-18
Packaged: 2018-04-02 11:19:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 22,257
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4058032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cosmicwriter/pseuds/cosmicwriter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Pearl is determined to work hard in college to achieve her dreams, but the mysterious woman with big pink hair is very distracting...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Mysterious Pink Lady

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone! This fan fiction was inspired by acepalindrome.tumblr.com's au, so if you like it, check her out! I hope you enjoy it! Disclaimer: I don't own Steven Universe or any of its characters. If I did, the show would be a lot gayer.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! This fan fiction was inspired by acepalindrome.tumblr.com's au, so if you like it, check them out! I hope you enjoy it! Disclaimer: I don't own Steven Universe or any of its characters. If I did, the show would be a lot gayer.

It was every bit as intimidating as I had imagined. The large open doors laid before me, calling me towards the marble building they held, but somehow I couldn't manage to move. Beach City University was one of the best universities in Northern America and it had a physical science program that won awards from every highly credited science organization I could think of. A degree from BCU would, at the very least, get NASA's attention. So why couldn't I move my feet?  
Students swarmed around me as I pretended to be admiring architecture integrity of the main building. Honestly, it wasn't hard to look impressed; the attention to detail was impeccable. The university’s lobby was a large brick building with Corinthian pillars that held up the marble awning . Towering towards the sky was a massive golden dome resting on a rotunda and Hhdden between the magnificent structure was the key to my future...if only I could walk through the doors. Once I did...there was no turning back. If I failed, then that was it; the chance of a lifetime wasted. I might have stood there forever if a deep voice hadn't interpreted my thoughts.  
“Hey, you.”  
I turned around and was faced with a tall black woman close behind me. Her hair was big and puffy and her face was framed with tinted rectangular glasses. She was dressed pretty plainly in a red t-shirt with a logo from a familiar boxing company, tight yoga pants, and black and red protective gloves. “Oh, I'm sorry, am I standing in your way?”  
“No. I was just wondering if you were alright. You haven't moved in awhile.” she said calmly.  
“Oh! Well that's very kind of you but your concern is completely unwarranted-I’m fine!” I said, mustering up a false cheery tone.  
“Let's get going then.” The larger woman grabbed my hand and pulled me towards the double doors.  
She maneuvered the crowded area with confidence, making it easy to follow her past the honeysuckle dotted lawns and through the large lobby doors. When we walked through the doors we were immediately greeted with the end of a long line.  
“Thank you so much,-uh, what's your name?” I said, dropping my hand.  
“Garnet. ”  
“ Nice to meet you Garnet. I'm Pearl.”  
After the introductions were over, Garnet nodded and we waited together in silence. I took the opportunity to look around the building. The spacy room was bathed in rainbow colored light due to the intricate stained glass windows and large copper statues of academic heroes glittered throughout the room. Above us, inside the dome was a mural painted of the starry night sky and while I waited in line I tried to name as many constellations as I could. Perhaps the best part of the room was the very center. On top of a sleek pedestal laid one of the first rovers to ever explore Mars, and it was designed and created by a BCU junior. It's design was far more efficient than stylish, but it did its job flawlessly. The rover, or Destiny as it had been named, collected data that supported the the water on mars theory. The rover's creator, Valerie Oilman, had been celebrated in the scientific community. She had won a Planetary Achievement Award, a Nobel Explorer Medal...I could only hope to do something that amazing one day.  
“Pearl.” Garnet's low voice said, and I looked up. It was our turn and I was holding up the line. I got to the desk as quick as I could and mentally scolded myself for not paying better attention. As I pulled out my admissions papers, I wondered if the desk people noticed I was blushing. The cheery blonde girl with the name tag SADIE didn't seem to notice and the lanky boy next to her was too buried in a magazine to pay me any mind.  
Sadie took the papers from me, stamped them, and handed them back to me. “Alright, Pearl, you can head over to the the admissions office to receive your schedule, your photo ID, meal plan, and then you'll head over to the auditorium for the student welcoming ceremony, okay?” I nodded and moved aside so Garnet could get her papers stamped.  
Time flew by after that; Garnet and I were able to get everything we needed quickly. My student ID photo was unflattering (is my nose really that long?) but I tried not to focus on that too much. Garnet found us two seats in the auditorium somewhere in the middle of the room, on the edge of the row. She leaned back and stared straight ahead, while I sat straight up and looked around. It was only the first day and students were already polarizing into different groups; there were the artistically talented goths, the rich kids that were there on their parents money, the geeks ( who seemed to be lead by a white haired girl with large, circular glasses), the soon to be cheerleaders, and the jocks (their leader appeared to be a white haired girls with vitiligo that was running up and down the aisle). Even the weird loners were traveling in groups of at least three.  
The feeling of isolation hit me like a punch in the stomach. It was only the first day and I already felt alone and overwhelmed; the students around me started to blend together into a monstrous mass I didn’t stand a chance against. Their collective noise blew over me like strong ocean waves.  
“This isn't happening. Not here, come on you're embarrassing yourself! Not again...it just...it's not fair! I worked hard to get here, I should be enjoying this! I should finally be happy! I should...''  
“Pearl” a faint voice in the background said.  
I tried to focus in on the calm voice, but the sound was garbled.  
“Pearl, listen to me. Find something in this room and focus on it.”  
I mechanically moved my head from side to side, trying to find something in the room that stood out. The room seemed to swirl together and move like a swarm of bees, but in the corner of my eye I saw a singular form part the crowd. My eyes followed her through the crowd, watching as every part of her seemed to get clearer and sharper. Everything around her became irrelevant; the rainbow colored mass melted away and their once deafening roar became background noise.  
“Have you found something yet?” Garnet asked.  
I managed a feeble nod.  
“Good. Focus on that thing and inhale for 4 seconds.”  
Without the voice or the will to ask why, I did as I was told. I gulped down air for four seconds while concentrating on the woman's massive pink hair.  
“Now hold it for 7 seconds.” Garnet said calmly.  
My mouth clamped shut and I sat completely still, mesmerized by the large woman moving gracefully through the crowd. Her face was round and kind, her eyes were a dark brown color that radiated warmth, and her hair was so big and curly it literally bounced when she walked. The woman was tall and large; she immediately stuck out in the crowd, (I'm honestly surprised I didn’t notice her sooner) and the dress she wore floated around her like the cloud she descended from when she fell from heaven. Just looking at her gave me a warm feeling in my stomach.  
“Now exhale for 8 seconds.” I let out a shaky breath for 8 seconds as I watched the pink lady disappear into the crowd.Who was she? What was her name? Would I ever see her again?  
“Thank you.” I told Garnet when I could speak again.  
“Breathing in that manner will stop or reduce the effects of a anxiety attack; you should do it again if you have another one.” she said factually.  
“Wait, what? That wasn't- I didn't”  
A hush fell over the auditorium as the bright fluorescent lights dimmed to something softer, and everyone rushed to take their seats. The stage lit up with spotlights, illuminating a single microphone on the center of the stage and large speakers that were dangerously close to the edge. Heavy footsteps echoed across the stage.  
“I'm Dean Dewy and I'm here to welcome you to Beach City University! Before we begin, I would like each and everyone of you to give yourself a round of applause for being excepted into one of the best universities in the state!" the red faced man said.  
Despite the audience's a halfhearted applause, the noise was still defending. "The sheer potential in each and everyone of you is just astounding! Here at Beach City University..."  
I leaned back and tried to listen to the rest of Dean Dewey's stiff address, but my mind kept wandering back to the pink woman. What classes is she taking? Was there any chance she would be in my Physics class? Despite my best efforts, I still couldn't help but daydream about her. When I walked into class Monday morning, she could be sitting there, next to the only other empty seat. She would flash me her kind smile and introduce herself and we'd hit it off right away. We'd have tons of study dates and sleep overs were we would stay up all night talking about the stars. I daydreamed the rest of the assembly and to this day I still can't remember the rest of Dewey's speech.  
•••  
“Be friendly”, I reminded myself as I turned the key to my dorm room. She's going to be your roommate for the next four years, so it's important that she likes you.  
When I pushed open the door, I was greeted to a unique site. The dorm seemed to be divided, one side was covered with a flurry of boxes, piles of clothes, and miscellaneous items; the other side was neat and clean, marked only by the small twin mattress and the few boxes I had put on it earlier. Closing the door behind me, I walked in and maneuvered around my roommate's stuff. "Hello?”  
Crash. The sound of pans falling echoed throughout the small room and my new roommate peered over the island's counter top. “Hi there!”  
She disappeared and walked out of the kitchen. “I'm Amethyst.”  
Amethyst was short, with long white hair and what I assumed were purple contacts. I stared at her blankly for a few moments, before I remembered I was suppose to say something. “Hello! My name is Pearl, and I'm your new roommate!” I cringed. Why did I say that? My status in relation to hers was obvious.  
“What's up Pearl? You want some brownies or something?”  
I froze. Common curtsey would suggest that I accept her offer, but the idea of eating a brownie made my stomach churn. “No...thank you?”  
“Suit yourself.” Amethyst shrugged and walked back into the kitchen.  
Had I offended her? Did she think I was stuck up? I wanted to apologize but I didn't want to make the situation any worse than it already was.  
The rest of the night pasted quietly, and I unpacked my boxes while Amethyst clattered around in the kitchen. After scarfing down some fruit and turning on my alarm, I collapsed on my bed. My body was exhausted but my mind was wide awake. Tomorrow is the beginning of everything I've ever wanted...what if I mess it up? I might have been the smartest student at my high-school, but here an astronomy nerd is just a dime a dozen. Will I be able to keep up with everyone else? What if I have an attack in class and my professors hate me for being difficult? I'll have to sit alone at lunch tomorrow for sure...nobody's going to want to sit with me... I worried until I drifted off to sleep.


	2. Rose Tinted Lenses

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry it took so long to write this, I don't even have a good excuse. Disclaimer: I don't own Steven Universe or any of the characters. Even if I did, it would be hard to make the show gayer.

I took one last look at my class schedule before deciding I was in the right place: Physics 101. The classroom was spacious, with eight rows of desks and chairs positioned towards the pulled out screen and wooden desk at the front of the class. There were a few physics posters on the walls, but for the most part the white walls were bare. Most of the chairs were filled with bored looking students, and unfortunately none of them were filled with the mysterious pink lady. Letting out a sigh, I slid into one of the plastic chairs near the front and waited for our professor to arrive. My pencils and papers were stacked neatly in front of me until I got bored, then I started to draw the woman at the assembly. By the time our professor arrived, her kind brown eyes and loving smile where staring back at me.  
Our professor was a stout woman with silver hair and purple glasses, dressed in a poncho that was three sizes too big. As she rung her hands, her beady eyes darted across the room.   
“My name is Professor Tourmaline and I will be your professor for the duration of this course. Let's start with an easy question, shall we? Who can tell me what Newton's Second Law of Motion is?” a shrill voice echoed throughout the room.  
My head snapped up; I knew that! “Newton's Second Law of Motion states that the acceleration of an object is based on its mass and the amount of force applied.”  
Mrs. Tourmaline narrowed her eyes at me. “ I was speaking, of course, to the students in my class who raise their hands.”   
She turned on her heel and I watched her graying hair swish back and fourth. What just happened? I hadn't meant to cause a scene...I just knew the answer and got excited. It was the first day of college and already my teacher hated me? That had to be a new record. Slumping back in my seat, I started scribbling down notes. Mrs. Tourmaline was talking a mile a minute and switching slides on the projector screen quickly; the whole class was struggling to keep up. it was going to be a long day.   
•••  
The cafeteria was packed with students and the smell of meat wafted through the air. Wooden tables and plastic chairs accounted for most of the room, with a serving table in the front of the room. Gazing out into the sea of college students, I quickly determined I would eat my lunch outside. That was one of the nicer things about Beach City University: if you didn’t have any one to eat lunch with, you could eat it in the garden. I scooped up my lunch tray and headed towards the door.  
"Pearl?"  
I whipped around and saw Garnet, sitting alone. “Um...Garnet?”   
Garnet was stretched out at a small table near the door. “Do you need somewhere to sit?”  
I nodded and slid in beside her; I was relieved I didn't have to eat alone. After a few minutes of eating in awkward silence (or what I thought to be awkward silence, Garnet didn't seem to mind), I thought of something to say. “So why are you here?”  
Garnet peered down at me from behind her tinted glasses. “Excuse me?”  
“I-I mean what are you here to study?”  
“I'm here on a boxing scholarship.” she said, forking some blueberries into her mouth.  
“So you're majoring in...” I pressed.  
“I like punching things.”  
I didn't ask any more questions after that. Instead I focused on the plate in front of me; a weird mix of fruit, meat and mashed potatoes. While I ate, I day dreamed about being strapped into a space crafted, and jetting off to explore the galaxy. My mind spun with swirling purple galaxies and new environments of the planets to be explored; I though about suns that burn a thousand times brighter than ours, and moons that held new life. There was so much to explore; suns, stars, nebulas... flash of bright pink hair pulled me out of my thoughts. Was that her? I jumped up and spun around: and there she was. The woman swayed through the crowd with her lunch tray in toe, but this time I was determined not to lose her. After untangling myself from my lunch table I pushed through the crowd and ran after her. I weaved through the crowd; barely missing a patch of foreign exchange students and blowing past a timid blue haired girl. The mysterious pink lady breezed through the threshold and I followed close behind her. The crowd of students thinned out once we got outside, and I was suddenly hit with the realization that I didn't know what to say to her. I froze. Why would she want to talk to me? She's a magnificent goddess and I'm a lanky space freak.   
The woman was about to disappear out of sight, so I settled for just being near her and sprinted to keep up. Hesitantly, I followed her into the garden but kept my distance; the garden was significantly less populated. Maybe this is a bad idea...following someone with no intent of talking to them is wandering into stalker territory. Is it really worth the risk of getting expelled? Before I could turn back, she sat down on one of the white wooden benches. I ducked behind one of the rose bushes and held my breath. She didn’t seem to notice. My shoulders dropped and I started to take in the atmosphere. The air was heavily perfumed with the scent of roses. Vines with purple flowers scaled the garden walls and blanketed the area in a coat of green, and stalks of hollyhock swayed with the breeze. As I watched her eat and dreamily stare off into space, I realized I need to call her something other than “the pink lady.” She looked so at home surrounded by pink roses, almost as if she were one of them. Until I knew her real name, I decided to call her Rose.   
Rose tore up pieces of her sandwich and tossed them to the brown and white sparrows hoping around her feet.  
“Oh, you guys like that don't you?” she chimed, as sparrows fought over bread crumbs. Her voice was as deep as the ocean.   
Rose stood up and slipped off her shoes. She wandered around the garden, dancing back and forth between rose bushes and stooping down to examine everything, even the mangled weeds. Her dress flew around her as she danced; I was mesmerized. Once Rose was satisfied seeing and smelling everything, she grabbed her lunch tray, put her shoes back on and walked out. For I a moment I sat still, watching her leave, then I hauled myself up. The campus clock tower chimed and I realized I was going to be late for my next class, which was all the way across campus. I took off running, dashing past the rose covered hedges and ducking under the archway. Even so I was still late to my next class, but I felt like it was worth it. Rose was amazing, and I was already looking forward to seeing her the next day.   
•••  
My campus map was crinkled and worn, but I was as lost as ever. I could have sworn I followed the directions to a te, but instead of dorm rooms I found myself standing in front of a large sports field. The moonlight illumined the silver bleachers in the middle of the field and the goal posts on either side. Wind whistled through the fence around the field; leaving a trail of goose bumps down my arm. From the bleachers, three dark silhouettes cast shadows on the grass. A loud laugh echoed across the field; sending a shiver down my spine. I had a bad feeling about asking them for help, but it was late and I wanted to be home already.   
“Hello? Can any of you tell me how to get to the D wing dorm rooms?” I called out, intertwining my fingers into the fence.   
Their voices stopped. The figures stood up slowly and advanced towards me. A bad feeling lodged itself in my throat; asking for help was a bad idea. I jumped when a loud crash shrieked through the air as the tallest woman slammed the gate behind them. They stepped out into the street light and my breath caught in my throat: it was the white haired jock and she didn't look happy. She was flanked by the girl with oval glasses and the timid blue haired girl I saw in the cafeteria. To her left was the girl from the assembly with oval shaped glasses from the assembly, and at her right was the blue haired girl I ran past in the cafeteria .   
“I-I was just wondering if you knew where the D wing is? I'm lost.”  
"Jasper, she isn't worth it." The girl in the oval glasses said. Her friends shifted around her, although I'm not sure I could call them that; the geeky looking girl seemed indifferent, but the blue haired girl looked like she was being held prisoner.   
"I didn't ask you Peridot!" Jasper shouted, then turned back to me. Her large hands threw me into the fence and pinned me down. “Of course your lost, you don't belong here!”  
I stared at her, shocked. “What? But I have the paper work and everything! I took the entrance exam and-”  
She barked a humorless laugh. Her fingers dug into my shoulder blades, yanking me forward, and then she threw me back into the fence. “Take any exam you want;you'll still never belong here. Your kind is a dime a dozen! Face it: you don't belong at a place like this, and you know it! If I were you, I'd get out of here, while you still can.”   
Jasper tore me off the fence and pushed me face first into the ground. She turned and strutted off, Peridot following her. The blue haired girl hesitated, and snatched up the map I dropped. She thrusted into my hands. “You missed the turn off for the D wing dorms here.” she whispered, pointing to a fork in the map.  
How had I missed that? Frowning down at the directions, I went through my steps again. The fork in the road was a few miles past the school's atrium. While I was passing it, I started to wonder what Rose's favorite constellation was and...oh. That explains it.  
“Lapis! What are you doing?” Jasper howled. Lapis shot me a sympathetic smile and ran off after Jasper.   
Standing up, I brushed the dirt off my clothes. My hands and knees had taken most of the fall, but the cool cement had left some cuts on my body that I would need to tend to later. I walked home sore, and uneasy. Was Jasper right? My grades and my extracurricular activities had earned me my place here, but that didn't necessarily mean I belonged. Beach City University had a reputation of teaching only the most prestigious of students; even the people here on scholarships came from wealthy and respected families. And then there was me. While it was true I worked hard to get here, I stuck out. My clothes were worn and my books were second hand, which was like a neon sign above my head...so maybe I didn't belong. But what did it matter? BCU was my dream school, it was my key to exploring the galaxy. I was going to take it, even if it didn't belong to me. When I finally got back to my dorm, Amethyst was splayed out over her bed and sound asleep. I moved silently to the bathroom, massaging Neosporin into my cuts and washing them off with water. Not bothering to take off my clothes, I slid into bed and stared at the ceiling until Amethyst's loud snoring lured me to sleep.


	3. Stalker, Stalker Behind the Wall, Whose the Fairest of Them All? ROSE QUARTZ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pearl isn't a stalker, she just really likes roses...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the support guys! It means so much to me! Disclaimer: I do not own Steven Universe of any of the characters.

My eyes wandered around the cafeteria. Jasper, flanked by Peridot and Lapis, stood out immediately, mostly because Jasper towered above the crowd and was yelling at a mousy looking girl for something or another. Amethyst drifted aimlessly around the lunch room; I was pleased to see she had gotten out of bed. When our alarm clock went off at 5 in morning she seemed upset, simply rolling over and going back to sleep. While I didn't see Rose in the sea of people, I did spot Garnet sitting at the same small table as the day before. My feet carried me towards her and I clung to my lunch tray, hoping Garnet would let me sit with her after yesterday's fiasco.   
“May I sit with you?” I heard myself ask.  
Garnet nodded and I sat beside her.   
“How was class today, Garnet?”  
“Fine.”   
“Anything interesting happen?” I pressed.  
“No.”   
Was she upset with me? Would I know if she was? Garnet kept the same composed face all the time, so it would be hard to tell. Not knowing what else to say, I turned my attention to my lunch tray. The meal was similar to the one before it; fish, a side of strawberries, baby carrots and milk, all of which I ate quickly, without really tasting. My mind was somewhere else. I was thinking of Rose; sitting with her on the white garden bench, her hand intertwined with mine. Rose brushing my bangs out of my eyes and her fingers trailing down my cheeks. She was laughing at something I said, and saying my name with her deep, calm voice.  
“Pearl.”  
That wasn't Rose's voice. I glanced up to Garnet, peering down at me with a furrowed brow. “Are you alright, Pearl? You look upset.”  
“Oh yes, I'm fine, I was just...daydreaming.”  
Garnet nodded and went back to eating. For someone who only met me two days ago, she was just so considerate. Once again, I felt guilty for my behavior the previous day.   
“Garnet, I want to apologize for breaking social protocol and leaving so abruptly the day before.”  
“Don't apologize for something you're going to do again.”  
“What? I'm not going to -”  
Garnet pointed across the room and I followed her finger. It was Rose. Somehow I missed her arrival, but now she was heading out of the cafeteria with a tray of food in her hand. Despite what I was just saying to Garnet I leaped to my feet and trailed after her. The crowd melted away, and soon enough I was crouched behind a rose bush while the actual Rose was eating and staring off into space. She retraced yesterday's steps, smelling flowers, dancing with her shoes off, and feeding the birds. It was the same ordeal, and yet, it was like watching her do all of those things for the very first time. There was something new and enchanting to focus on every time; the way her hair swayed with the breeze, how adorable her tummy looked in her BCU jacket that she had pulled over a puffy white dress, and the way her eyes cricked when she smiled. I just wanted to absorb it all.  
•••  
Over the next few days I formed a routine. After my morning classes, I would sit with Garnet and eat as fast as I could before Rose arrived. Then, I would sit in the garden and enjoy Rose's presence until she left. While I was aware the my behavior would seem a tad...strange...to someone else, it's wasn't like anyone was getting hurt by my actions, and I had been calmer in the past week than I'd ever been before.  
Friday afternoon I was sitting and watching Rose when I heard a voice behind me.  
“Um, what are you doing here?”  
I nearly fell over trying to turn around, just to see Amethyst standing over me with her arms crossed. “Oh, good afternoon Amethyst! Um, you see I was just... admiring the campus's beautiful garden!”  
She raised an eyebrow at me. “From behind the bushes?”  
“Yes? You see this bush,” I said, cupping my hand around one of the bushes' roses, “just has the prettiest roses and I-”  
Amethyst stepped around me and moved aside some of the branches. “Oh my god, are you spying on her?” she said, looking at me with an amused expression on her face.   
“Keep your voice down!” I hissed, checking to make sure Rose didn't hear anything. She didn't seem to notice.   
“I can't believe it, my roommate is like, a psycho stalker. Have you ever considered, I dunno, talking to her? Like a normal human being?”   
“What would I possibly say to her?” I asked, dumbfounded.   
“ I dunno, 'Hi, I'm Pearl, I'm a weird space freak that has a stupid alarm clock that won't turn off unless my roommate breaks it and-'”  
“Wait, what?”  
“'-and I may or may not be stalking you. Wanna get coffee sometime?”  
I blinked. “I am not stalking her. It's not like I follow her around or anything, I just happen to like coming here in the afternoon! ”  
She rolled her eyes. “Whatever. Stalk Rose, don't stalk Rose, I don't really care.”  
“Hold on, her name is actually Rose?”  
“Uh, yeah, why does that surprise you?”  
“How do you know her?” I pressed.   
“She's in my Botany class; she's like, a total plant geek.”  
“You take a Botany class?”  
Amethyst shrugged. “I had an extra course to fill. What' s it to you?"  
A light bulb went off in my head as I found a way to spend more time around Rose. "Never mind, and thank you Amethyst, you've been very helpful!"   
"Whatever. This conversation is getting boring, so I'm going to go get a croissant. Good luck with, whatever this is...”   
As Amethyst trudged off I turned back to Rose. Somewhere during our conversation she had left. I sighed, and pushed myself off the ground. Note to self: sign up for the Botany course...and buy a new alarm clock.


	4. A Saucy Situation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pearl hopes the upcoming party will be the perfect chance to get to know Rose better, but things go a bit differently than she'd planned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For anyone who was waiting for this chapter, I'm so sorry it took so long! I hope the length makes up for it, and thank you so much for being patience with me! Disclaimer: I do not own Steven Universe or any of the characters.

Rose didn't come to the garden on Saturday and I was okay with that. There was nothing to be worried about; Rose was probably fine and just enjoying the weekend off campus! Just in case, I spent my day studying behind my usual rose bush, listening for the nonexistent usual laughter. As it turns out the garden is a great place to study. There was plenty for me to study; my brand new Botany text book, my standard course text books (Algebra, English, etc,), and most importantly, my Astronomy book. I struggled through a few chapters of Botany(who knew there where so many types of trees) but after awhile I switched back to my worn astronomy book. Hours passed quickly and I read until the words on the page disappeared with my reading light. Sunday mirrored Saturday in most ways, I studied in the community garden, had lunch, did Amethyst's and my laundry, then headed back to my dorm at nightfall. Amethyst was excitedly yelling about something or another and I was doing the best I could to keep up with our conversation, but luckily she didn't seem to notice my short comings as a conversational partner.  
“Anyway,” she said loudly, “is that really what you're wearing to the party? Because they might not let us in.”  
I frowned down at my blue pajama pants with little spaceships on them. “Party? Which party?”  
“Just a biggest, fanciest party of the school year! The one with all the free food? The one I've been talking about for the last five minutes? That party?”  
“Oh Amethyst, I'm not much of a party person. I'm afraid you'll have to go without me.”   
She smirked. “Well that's too bad, I guess I'll have to hang out with Rose Quartz all by myself.”  
“Rose? She'll be there?” I said, trying to keep my voice nonchalant.  
“Of course, and did you hear the part about the food? There's going to be tons of it!.”  
The wheels in my head started spinning. A social gathering was the perfect place to strike up a conversation with her...but what would I say? Would she even want to talk to me?   
“What would one even where to such an event?” I said, glancing at Amethyst’s black and purple tuxedo with bright yellow bow tie. That couldn't possibly be the proper attire.  
She shrugged. “I dunno, wear a dress or something. You do have one of those, right?”  
“Hmmm.... well I suppose I could wear my sister's old black dress.” I thought out loud.  
“Whatever!Just hurry up and get dressed, so we can go eat already!”  
When my sister first shoved a v-necked black dress into my suitcase, I proclaimed it a waste of space. She insisted though, and I was glad for it now. Since I didn't own make up or jewelry, it didn't take long for me to get ready. The black dress was simple enough to slip on and the shoes were pain black flats. Amethyst and I were headed towards the party in no time. On the way over she filled me in on the party details and I tried to pay closer attention this time. Apparently the event was a high class student mixer of sorts, sponsored by some wealthy donor. The idea of wealthy people attending this event made me even more nervous, but it was to late to back out now.   
When we arrived at the entrance of building F, we where greeted by Sadie and the boy from the admissions table. We showed them our student I.D's and we were on our way. The event space was large with the front of the room mostly barren and the back of the room dotted with white cloth covered tables. Hundreds of twinkling lights where strung up around the walls and the light bounced off the hard wooden floors. There where people everywhere; the collective sound of everyone's conversations filled the area with white noise. Center pieces of purple flowers in small blue vases gave the room an intoxicating floral scent, mixed in the smell of the freshly baked bread on the tables. Amethyst was pulling me toward an empty table but my mind was on something more important than food.   
“Order us something to eat, ok? I'll join you in a moment.” I said, searching for a face in the crowd.  
Amethyst shrugged and let go off my hand. I squeezed through the packed area, trying not to bump into anyone. After a couple of minutes of searching, I felt a hand seize my arm. “Larimar, where on Earth have you been all day?”  
I twisted around and was faced with a short, brown haired girl with furious green eyes. My eyes fell on to her name tag, which read:Emerald. “Did you just call me-”  
“We don't have time for this! If you mess this up we'll all get in trouble! I'm not letting your shenanigans affect my paycheck!” she hissed, dragging me towards the kitchen.   
“While I have no idea what you're talking about, I can tell you that I'm not responsible for your-” I said, trying to free my arm from her iron grip.   
“Oh don't start that with me, there's no getting out of this! Do you really think I'm going to let you slack off and enjoy the party while I cover for you? Again?”  
I took a quick look around the kitchen. Chefs bustled around me, some caring arm fulls of ingredients and other caring hot pans and pots of food. While the kitchen was quieter than the event room, the noise of dishes being washed, food being cooked and orders being shouted was still overwhelming.. The smell was a mix of ingredients, but rosemary and fish was the most powerful. My eyes fell on the woman's dress and suddenly I understood. She thought I was a server because my outfit was almost identical to her serving uniform.  
“I think there's been a misunderstanding, I'm not really-”  
“Order ready for table six!” one of the chefs shouted, setting a plate of food down on one of the serving shelves.  
Emerald snatched the plate and thrust it into my hands. “You better get going, Larimar.”   
I looked at the plate in my hands dumbfounded. She wasn't serious, was she? “You have to listen to me, I'm not a server-”  
“We don't have time for your games!” she snapped, shoving me out of the kitchen. The double doors swung shut behind me and I gazed out into the crowd. Just setting the food down and leaving wasn't an option; somebody was expecting this food. I supposed I would just deliver the food and then slip away, back to Amethyst. Maneuvering throughout the crowd was easier this time, because people saw the food and gave me space. I floated from table to table looking for number six and when I finally found it I stood before a bored looking man with oversized oval glasses.   
“You ordered the trout brochette, right?” I said, not meeting his eyes but instead focusing on his dark curls.   
“Yeah, that's me.” he said, and I slid the plate onto the table. Then I spun around on my heels and tried to slip through the crowd.  
“Waitress , wait!” he called, and I froze, slowly turning back around. Technically I wasn't his waitress but he was talking to me.   
“Yes, sir?”  
“Can I get a refill?” he said, shaking his glass enough to make the ice cubes clink together.   
I stared at him blankly. This was not what I was suppose to be doing, but his expectant blue eyes where burning holes into my hands. I could feel my temperature rise and small beads of sweat prick my skin as his irritation grew.  
“Of course.” I said with a weak smile. Taking his glass, I headed for the kitchen again. None of the cooks paid me any mind as I dug through the kitchen's fridge for lemonade, but I felt like a thousand eyes were on me. I didn't belong here and surely someone would notice I wasn't a waitress. It was clearly stated on page 345 of the University Code of Conduct; impersonating university staff can get you expelled! My hands shook as I poured the glass; the clinking ice cubes sound like alarm bells but still no heads turned. The lemonade went back in the fridge and I was headed for the doors with the drink when Emerald appeared out of no where.  
“Why are you heading out with just a glass of lemonade when there is a ton of food that needs to be run?” she asked.  
“Well I was just going to get a refill for table six-” I stammered.  
“You can serve more than one table in a trip! God Larimar, did you even take basic restaurant training?”  
“No, I didn't.” I answered, frustrated.  
She let out a sharp sigh. “Doesn't surprise me. Take one of those serving trays,” she said, pointing to a stack of large, circular trays that had fold out stands attached to them, “and run as much food as you can. And when you come back, run even more food. Nod if you understand.”  
For a moment I stared at her, trying to think of any excuse to get myself out of there. Nothing came to mind. I gave Emerald a feeble nod and propped up one of the serving trays. Sitting the glass of lemonade back down, I loaded up my tray with plates and bowls of food, making sure to squeeze the lemonade onto the tray. Using my back to swing open the doors, I slipped through the crowd and found all the corresponding tables to the food. Finally, I got the lemonade to the guy at table six. He gave me a grunt of approval then went back to eating. For a moment, I stood there confused at what to do next. I wanted to try and find Rose Quartz in this crowd...but I was left holding a tray of glasses in need of refills and dirty dishes.   
Returning to the kitchen and heading out again with food was easier this time; I just did as I was told and went in the direction everyone expected me too. “You can do this,” I told myself, “you're good at following orders.”  
For the most part I was invisible. Chefs shouted food orders and I picked them up without any other acknowledgment. While a few guests gave me grateful smiles for bringing out their food, most of them only acknowledged me when they needed something. That was fine with me, it allowed me to fall into an easy rhythm of refilling glasses, bringing out food, and politely asking if there was anything else I could get for them. I even managed to get a few nods out of Emerald, which made me feel good despite the fact that I wasn't actually a staff member.   
“Is there anything else I can get you?” I asked, sliding the lasagna onto the table without looking up.  
“Yeah, I need seven bottles of mustard and – wait, Pearl? What the heck are you doing?”  
I looked up to see Amethyst staring at me with wide eyes. “Oh, um I got mistaken for one of the waitresses so I decided to just...go with it.”  
She squinted at me. “You're actually working? At a party? What's the matter with you?”  
Not knowing how to explain myself, I focused instead on taking her drink for a refill. “So...I'll be right back with those mustard bottles, okay?”   
“Wait! Pearl, you don't have to get me those, I was just joking!” she called out, as I was turning around.  
“I'll come back with just the drink then.” I said, and continued walking.   
She said something else but I was already headed towards the kitchen. Things where staring to calm down, most of the people where seated and eating, although there where a few people standing and waiting. At the center of the room there was a mic standing up in anticipation for the guest speaker, most likely a representative of the school . I got around the standing students and filled up Amethyst’s Coke, while also snatching a large plate of spaghetti doused in marinara sauce. When I got back out to the main room there where more people surrounding the mic and a deep voice speaking into it.   
“- and I would like everyone to give a big round of applause for the sponsor that made all this possible: Rose Quartz!”  
The room erupted into applause and I froze. Rose floated through the crowd and took the mic while I drifted more towards her than towards table eight. She looked magnificent; her thick, curly hair framed her face and her ruby red lipstick contrasted nicely against her pale skin. Soft, white fabric was draped on her body, tumbling down to the floor until it ended with a lace trim.   
“Welcome, everyone to the Beach City Freshman Ball! I am so excited to have the honor of hosting this event, and I hope everyone here enjoys themselves and gets to know their fellow students better. Before the dancing begins I just want to thank everyone for attending tonight's event. While this event is free, I would like to take a moment to remind everyone that there are donation baskets at the front of the room. All the money donated will go to the Beach City Botany Organization. It's a wonderful organization that's planting trees all over Beach City and every dollar helps! Thank you for your time!” Rose's airy but deep voice chimed into the microphone.   
The room applauded her once more and I made a mental note to donate some money. The crowd started to mill back to their seats and I took a few steps forward, tearing my eyes off Rose to look for table eight. As I stepped forward, something heavy hit the top of my back. Time seemed to slow down as I tumbled through the air. I could see Rose turning around just in time to see me lose control of the food and drink. The angelic smile melted off her face; her eyes went wide shock. Oh, and the sound! The splat of spaghetti hitting Rose and the shriek of glass shattering was almost deafening. From my heap on the ground I almost couldn't look up, but somehow I managed to unscrew my eyes. Rose was standing still in horror, dripping with Coke , spaghetti noddles and marinara sauce. Her beautiful, gorgeous, expensive looking dress was now an awful mix of brown and red spots. Noodles and chunks of meat rolled off her and hit the floor, while drops of Coke rained down from the hem of her dress. Behind me I heard someone laugh, and I turned around to see Jasper glaring down at me with an amused expression on her face. She was surrounded by Peridot, who rolled her eyes at me and Lapis, who simply wouldn't look at me at all.   
“Run,” I thought, and I scrambled to my feet. The sound of shoes crunching on glass and Rose saying something about taking a moment to clean herself up followed me out as I ran. People went back to whatever they were doing before, janitorial staff where called to clean up the mess and music played, but I didn't look back as I dashed to the exit.  
●●●  
My clothes were neatly folded and put away in there drawer, almost as if I didn't wear them. I buried my face in the pages of my chemistry book and stared at the equations until I couldn't see them anymore. After a couple of hours Amethyst came home.   
“Wowza Pearl, I've never seen someone screw up so badly before!” she said, flopping onto her bed.   
I cringed into my book. “Welcome back Amethyst, did you enjoy the rest of the party?”  
“Was that your plan all along? Dress up as a waitress, snag a plate spaghetti, then dump it all over Rose? Because that's one heck of a way to get a girl's attention.”   
“I didn't do that on purpose!” I said, feeling my face get warm.   
“There's no way that anyone is accidentally that clumsy! It's just not possible!”   
“I-I was pushed!” I stammered.  
“Sure you were.” she said, laughing and licking some left over lasagna off her face.   
I slammed my book close and threw the covers over my face.   
Amethyst was right; I had screwed up. Any chance I had of getting closer to Rose had vanished in that moment. I would forever be know as the girl that dumped food all over her. What on earth was I going to do about Botany class in the morning?


	5. To Study Or Not To Study

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leaves are useless and Pearl is very gay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, thanks for being patient with me, I hope you enjoy the new chapter. Disclaimer:everything belongs to Rebecca Sugar and Cartoon Network.

Botany was not nearly as bad as I expected it to be. True, Amethyst sat beside me and made faces at me, and the teacher was at best dull and hard to listen to, but at least Rose paid me no attention. Rose sat in front of me, her massive pink hair piled into a high ponytail. She took down notes with an attentiveness that I admired, glancing up every once in awhile to smile and nod at our professor. The eager smile on Rose's face and the light in her eyes almost made the class as good as Astronomy. Almost. All information is important on its own accord, but leaf types may be the lowest form of valuable information. As hard as I tried to pay attention, my eyes drifted towards her large curls. They moved from side to side and up and down as she wrote; they were mesmerizing. I was tempted to run my fingers through her hair.  
“Trees can be divided into two categories, trees that shed their leaves in the winter and trees that keep their leaves all year long. Can anyone tell me the names of these tree types?” the professor asked in a slightly louder monotone voice.  
Several people raised their hands, including Rose. “I think we should hear from our newest student. Pearl?”  
Mrs. Carnelian's brown eyes bore into mine and a thin smile stretched across her face. What was it with teachers and putting students on the spot? Forced participation was an archaic high school tradition; it wasn't a practice that should be used in a refined college. Perhaps that was something to discuss with Dean Dewey.   
“Anytime now Pearl; we'll wait.” Mrs. Carnelian said, raising her thin eyebrows.   
My peers were starting to twist in there chairs to look at me; I could feel my skin prick with their stares. I had read about this before, in my Botany book, but my mind was coming up blank. Tree types and leaves and shedding patterns tumbled around my head, each one blurry and uninformative. The classroom was starting to slip out of view, my skin was starting to heat up uncomfortably, and the lump in my throat returned. Despite no longer being able to clearly see the eyes of my peers, I could still feel the weight of their glare. “Broad leaf and Pineneedle?” I asked breathlessly.   
Students held their breath to keep from laughing. Well, most of them anyway, Amethyst howled with laughter. Mrs. Carnelian narrowed her eyes. “Incorrect. Some one else?”  
More people raised their hands then they did the last time around, no doubt assured by the fact that someone had already gotten the answer horribly wrong. “Rose?”  
“The two types are Deciduous and Evergreen.”  
“Very good. Moving on to alternate and opposite leave positions-” Mrs. Carnelian continued.   
I didn't hear another word she said though, I was still trying to catch my breath.   
●●●  
I sat at my normal table with Garnet, although Amethyst sat with us that day. Garnet's hair was done in dreads that reached her lower back and she was dressed in her work out clothes; her gym bag sat at her feet. Amethyst was still in the snuggie she woke up in (despite my protests about it not being proper school attire) and her hair messily frame her face. While we ate, Amethyst recounted the tale of my classroom blunder.   
“And then the teacher was all like 'Answer my tree riddle' and Pearl was like “uh, uh PINENOODLE AND BOGLEAF-”  
“That's not what I said!”  
“-It was ridonkulous!” she concluded, taking another bite of hamburger.   
Garnet looked down at Amethyst, her glasses sliding down to the bridge of her nose. “So did you know the answer then?”  
Amethyst blushed. “ Well, I, uh- I knew it wasn't broad leaf.”  
“Hmm.”  
We were all quite while we finished our meal, Amethyst out of embarrassment, Garnet out of normalcy and me out of concentration. I searched the crowd for the familiar mass of pink hair. I located Rose just in time to see her leave her circle of friends and I stood up.  
“So is this the part of the meal where you leave to follow Rose around like a puppy?”  
“Absolutely not! I just need to get some air!”  
“Hahaha, sure you do! Give your girlfriend a kiss for me, will you?”  
Rose, my girlfriend? What a preposterous idea! What an outlandish, farfetched,... wonderful idea. Luckily I turned around before they could see me blush. Over the past week I had memorized the lunchroom’s layout and I was able to float through it easily. I twirled through the different lunch tables, dodged the table of students that were always selling something, kept near the right wall to avoid bumping into the tray discard table and (despite their protests) walked through the group of students playing Cards Against Humanity in front of the door. It's hardly my fault they decided to play right in front of the exit. Outside the air was crisp and dotted with fluffy clouds. The pavilion was mostly empty of people, except for a few sleeping students stretched out on the metal tables with their heads buried in textbooks. By the time I made it to the garden Rose was already sitting on her usual white bench and I was able to slip unnoticed behind my rose bush. She followed her usual routine of feeding the brown and white sparrows but this time she had a watering can with her. As Rose walked around each plant, she bent down to carefully tip her watering can over each one. I watched her mezmerized; her hair tumbled downward as she bent over and it created a shiny pink curtain of hair. While she worked she sang; her voice sounding like wind chimes. There was a terrifying moment when she came over to water the bush I was sitting behind but she didn't seem to notice me nervously crouched behind the plant. Eventually she watered all the plants in the opening part of the garden and she moved on to the plants decorating the gazebo in a further part of the garden.  
I hesitantly rose after I saw the last of Rose's huge pink hair disappear, then I went to sit on the white bench. There was no way to follow her without getting caught, so I wasn't sure what to do with the rest of lunch break. I settled on cloud watching. The sky was less detailed during the day, while there were a few clouds in the sky I couldn't say I preferred them to stars. Still, it was something to do. The clouds were cumulus, and based on there color I'd have guessed there was a good chance of rain.  
"It is really nice out today, isn't it?" A deep, perfect voice said in front of me.  
My head shot up. Rose stood in front of me, smiling. Her hair framed her face perfectly.  
"Oh! Um, yes! I was just...cloud watching...because I love clouds?" I managed to get out.  
She sat beside me, still towering over me. "The clouds are quite lovely today."  
I nodded.  
"Did you enjoy your first Botany lesson today? I know it was a little overwhelming, but please don't get discouraged! Botany has so much to offer, and Mrs. Carnelian is a good teacher once you get use to her." Rose said enthusiastically.  
"I...I guess it's all just a little confusing, but it's not anything I can't handle!" I heard myself say, but it was honestly hard to focus with Rose leaning so close to me.  
Rose's face lit up. "I can help clear up some of that confusion for you. We should get together and study sometime!"  
"We-we should do what?"  
“It will be wonderful! I have so many notes and reference books you can borrow!”  
Rose pulled out a piece of paper and a pen from the pocket of her overalls and scribbled something down on it. She took my hand and placed the piece of paper in it.   
“That's my number, give me a call when you want to have our study session. “  
She gave me one last radiant smile, then she stood up, picked up her watering can, and walked away. My hand was still tingling when I looked back down at the phone number.  
Later that day, Amethyst sighed and threw her hands up in the air. “I don't know man, call her, don't call her, just make a decision already!”   
“Decisions should never be made rashly, Amethyst. Besides, I've decided I'm not going to do it.”  
“It's not like your even listening to me, but you should just call her. She wouldn't have given you her number if she didn't wanna talk to you.”   
“Well, now, that's not necessarily true. There are many reasons someone might do something; causation does not equal correlation.” I said, pacing back and forth across the dorm room.   
Amethyst squinted. “What does that even mean?”   
“It means I am not going to accept someone's offer of company if they pity me!”  
“Um, pity? Have you ever considered that she might just wanna hang out with you cause she likes chilling with you?”  
“Why would she?”  
“I mean...you're not like, completely terrible.”  
I blinked. “Maybe not in your company, but I couldn't possibly be sufficient company for someone like Rose. I'm just trying to spare myself the humiliation.”  
“C'mon man, just do it! She might think you sticking your foot in your mouth is cute!”   
I cringed and pulled the slip of paper out of my pocket. Amethyst looked at me with an expectant grin on her face but I simply shook my head and tore the paper into eight equal pieces.   
“What'cha do that for?” she shouted.   
“To keep myself from doing anything stupid! Now, if you'll excuse me, I think I need some air.”  
“What you need is some self respect.” she muttered, but I pretended I didn't hear her.   
I closed the door behind me and left the dorm room building. I headed to my second favorite place on campus: the library. The university's library was magnificent, there were three floors, walls teeming with educational posters and tacky bulletin boards, and of course thousands of books. Old book smell blanked the air; the sound of shuffling pages sung throughout the building. Large bookshelves where lined up back to back, carrying books on everything from knitting to astral projection. I climbed the spiral staircase while tightly gripping the spiral stair rail, because, well, safety first!   
The Astrology section of the library started at 125.8 on the Dewey decimal system and I soon found myself pulling down handfuls of interesting books of the shelves. As I started to pull down another one, someone cleared there throat. I turned to see Rose Quartz, who was looking radiant with her massive pink hair in a long braid. She was dressed semi-casually in a white cotton dress that hit her knees and black ballet flats. It was hard not to stare.   
“Pearl? What a pleasure to see you again!” she chimed.   
“Oh, hello there Rose. I'm-I'm just getting some Astrology books!” I said, perhaps a little too loudly.  
“Oh, that's wonderful! This is perfect timing, I could teach you Arborology and you could teach me Astronomy.”  
“You-what? I don't even have a lesson planned...”  
Was it just wishful thinking or was she pouting?  
“Well, if you really don't want to...”  
“No! No, no I want to. I'd love to study with you Rose. So, let's go get a table!'  
●●●


	6. Stars and Leaves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pearl and Rose spend have a study date!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I am soooooo sorry about how long this chapter took. I have no good excuse, I can only say that if you're still here, there are no words for how grateful I am, and I will do everything I can to update more often! Everything here belongs to Cartoon Network and Rebeca Sugar!!!

Rose Quartz was many wonderful things; kind, compassionate, beautiful, but being a good student was not one of those things. It's not that she wasn't a good listener; she cupped her face in her palms, leaned forward, and focused on me intently. The problem was her frequent questions that all had very little to do with astronomy.

"Let's move on to the Andromeda, or Messier 31, the galaxy closest to our own. Andromeda is 2.2 million light years away from us and approximately 220,000 light years across."

"It sounds like a beautiful place," she said, with a cloudy look in her eyes.

“Well yes, I suppose it could be said that the Andromeda galaxy has a certain aesthetic appeal to it, but that's just one aspect of such a multifaceted galaxy! The Andromeda is a galaxy teeming with scientific inquiry, from the formations of it's thousands of stars, to the unexplored planets, the nebulae, not to mention the possibility of undiscovered elements!"

She gave me a dazzling smile. "What do you think life is like there?"

"Well unfortunately due to the amount of time travel to the Andromeda would take, exploration of the galaxy isn't really possible. However, as science moves forward, so does the possibility that one day I'll be able to give you and accurate description of what life in the Andromeda galaxy is like," I said.

Rose shook her head; a few loose curls swayed with her. "That's very knowledgeable Pearl, but that's not what I meant. What do YOU think think life there is like?"

"Besides the approximate distance from the Milky Way, I do not have enough information to make a valid conclusion."

She let out a small laugh. "Use your imagination!"

I felt my face heat up. We were getting off topic, Rose wasn't learning useful information, and I did not understand the point of aimless speculation. I took a deep breath and switched teaching methods."Is there anything you'd like to learn about in particular , Rose?”

She lit up. “I want to learn about everything, from the smallest blade of grass, to the largest mountain! Planet Earth is full of such wonder, such mystery! I can't wait to soak it all in!” she exclaimed. 

“ I meant...that's not...well, okay then. Maybe you should teach me some things about Botany now.” I said, taking a deep breath and shutting my Physics book. We could come back to it later.

“It would be my pleasure!” she said coolly, standing up and pushing in her chair.

I watched her, dazed, as she towered over me with an expectant smile on her face. “Yes?”

“Well aren't you coming?”

I blinked. “Well, I can if you want me too, although I'm not sure how helpful I'd be at choosing the right Horticulture books to study with.”

She laughed, her eyes twinkling. “The best way to study Botany is hands on! We'll have to stop by my room first if that's okay with you, but our lesson will take place in the campus garden!”

Rose's room? She was going to let me see her room?

“Okay,” I muttered, as I pushed in my chair. 

I followed Rose through the library. While I looked up at her, she was looking up at the paintings on the ceiling, amazed like a child seeing the stars for the first time. We didn't walk in silence; Rose told me about the architects that worked on the campus and pointed architectural details in the library. Of course, I knew all of the information before I had even applied to BCU, but it was so nice too listen to Rose talk. When we got outside she was quieter. She watched the clouds float across the sky, occasionally glancing down and grinning at me. Rose swiped her key card for her building, and we started the long process of climbing up the stairs. Apparently “broken elevator” was a new feature in all the college dorm buildings. 

“Make sure you hold the rail, Pearl.” Rose said, looking at me expectantly. 

My right hand grasped the rail. We walked in awkward silence...or at least I did. I couldn't find anything to say, but once again, Rose didn't seem to mind. Luckily Rose lived on the third floor, so our trip was relatively short. She held open the door for me. Blushing, I walked in and saw that her dorm had a similar messy/clean divide that mine had. Piles of dresses (most of them white) littered exactly one half of the room. They were piled up on her bed, they spilled out of open suitcases, they were draped over chairs, and one was even bunched up on the kitchen counter. The most striking thing about Rose's side of the room however, was the crayon drawings. There were tons of them decorating her wall, most were of cartoonist hearts, but some were of stars, and some were of self portraits of Rose herself. They were simple and messy, but the drawings were so joyful I couldn't help but smile. The hard wood floors were decorated with empty cartons of pink hair dye. I counted 14. Rose knelt to the ground and dragged something heavy out from under her bed. It was a large duffel bag that she slung over her shoulder, struggling slightly. Once again she held the door open for me, and once again I blushed and walked through it. We made the same awkward trip down the stairs. The silence was less akward when we got outside, as the cool breeze blew against our faces and the atmosphere was filled with students splayed out on the grass, frisbees zipping through the air, and the occasional holler from a poor student almost getting hit by one of those frisbees. Rose and I walked walked side by side until we arrived at the campus garden. We walked through the garden, strolling past her usual bench and my usual rose bush. I followed her farther than I'd ever ventured before, to a patch of the garden that was thick with trees. Rose gently placed her duffel bag down and got on her knees again. She unzipped it and dug through it until she triumphantly pulled out a small, shiny book entitled "A Complete Guide to Identifying Trees". 

She walked towards a small tree with glossy, green leaves and I followed. “Hey Pearl, what kind of tree do you think this is?”

I squinted up at the tree, desperately trying to remember something from my Botany lesson that might help me. “I-I honestly don't know, I'm sorry.”

She shook her head. “It was a rhetorical question, there's no need to say sorry! This tree is a Pacifica Dogwood, or a Corus Nuttallii, since you like to be science-y.”

“You can tell that just by looking at it?”

“Well sure,” she said, flipping through her guide book and handing it to me. I glanced down to see a picture of a tree in full bloom that looked nothing like the one in front of me. 

“But it wasn't hard, there were many tell-tale signs. Take the leaves for example. They're simple as opposed to compound, broadly elliptic, and have pointed tips. It's a relativity small tree, about 20-50ft in height, and Pacific Dogwood's are native to this region. We seemed to have missed the bloom of it's showy white flowers though, we'll have to come back in spring.”

“We? As in, together?”

She didn't seem to hear me as she wandered away to another tree. I ran to catch up with Rose and we stopped in front of a another tree. This one was also small. It was covered in moss, and the twisty seeds that fell to the earth in a helicopter motion dotted the branches.  
“What kind of tree is this one, Rose?” I asked.

She stepped forward and gently pulled a leaf off its branch, twirling it between her fingers. “A Vine Maple, otherwise known as an Acer circinatum.”

I immediately started to search through the guide book's index and Rose started to fish something out of her duffel bag. While I found the page with the tree's description and facts, she triumphantly pulled out a pair of what looked like large scissors. 

“What are-,” I said

“They're hand pruners! You use them to cut away dead, broken, or rubbing branches on trees,” she said, taking a step towards the tree and assessing one of the branches. In an instant, the pruners where posed around the start of the branch, ready to cut.

“Rose, no! You can't do that! You'll get expelled!” I cried.

She froze, but didn't put down the tree pruners. “Pearl, it's alright. Dean Dewey allows me to do this, because having Botany Majors care for the trees is less expensive than hiring an Arborist. I won't get in trouble, I promise,” she said, cutting straight through the branch. 

Rose walked over to me with the branch in hand. 

“Why did you do that? Doesn't losing a branch hurt the tree?”

She thrust the detached branch into my arms. “Just look at it, it's been dead for months now! There's been no new leaves growing on it and the bark is starting to rot away. Branches like these become entry points for disease! However, if you prune them away, eventually the tree will seal the wound and grow again, only this time, it will grow right,” she said triumphantly.

“That's so interesting! Oh, I wish I had a notepad to write all of this down with...” I mused to myself. 

Rose smiled down at me. “Don't worry, we'll have plenty of chances to go over it again.”  
●●●  
The entire sky was a brilliant pink, almost as pink as Rose's hair. As the sun began to settle into the horizon, I watched as Rose sewed the last of her seeds into the ground. After her lesson on tree identification and care, she lead me to the community part of the garden, where students could have their own patch of soil to plant whatever they want.

“I can request one for you too, if you want,” she said happily. 

I told her I would love that. For the rest of the evening, I sat by her side and watched her plant seeds while she talked. Rose talked about a lot of different things, but mostly, her appreciation for the Earth. 

"It's just all so...beautiful. I don't just mean the garden, I mean everything. From the smallest blade of grass to the largest Sequoia tree, from the tiniest insect to the largest blue whale, from the littlest drop of rain to the most massive storm cloud, everything is so...,"

"Complex?"

"Amazing. Everything is amazing. I find trees to be the the most amazing, as they filled the whole world's lungs with oxygen, but all the living creatures in the sky, land, and sea are just as interesting. I want to protect this place, and everything it has to offer. I want to fight!" she said.

  I didn't understand the determined aura she abruptly took on, but the look on her face was so focused and radiant, I just wanted to be a part of it.

 "I want to fight with you!"

  She looked down at me and offered a warm smile. Rose lifted her hand, and I watched her, stunned, as she brushed aside my bangs and trailed her fingers down the side of my face.

"R-rose, I-,"

"Sorry Pearl, you had dirt on your face."

I blinked, my face still tingling. "Of course, thank you."

I turned back to the sky, gazing up at the moon and staining to make out a few stars in the blueish-blackish sky. As I tried to piece together constellations, my mind returned to the astronomy club's logo (the little Dipper) and I sprang up.

  "What's wrong?"

  "The Astronomy Club, I signed up this morning and the first meeting is tonight, at 9 'o clock!"

  Rose glanced at her watch. "It's 8:53 now, you can still make it if you hurry!"

  "Thank you so much for a lovely afternoon, I'll see you-"

  "Tomorrow, in class! I can't wait."

She flashed me another warm smile and for a moment, I forgot what I was suppose to be doing. 

"Goodbye!" I called, then took off running. As I dashed through flowers and trees, I couldn't help but feel like just once, it was alright if I was late. 

●●●

Normally, a stray piece of paper drifting around in the wind wouldn't have caught my eye, but the previous day Rose gave me a very long rant about human litter ending up in the ocean and harming sea animals. I walked towards the garbage and picked up the crumpled paper. Instead of math problems or an essay assignment, there were bold letters that said:  
"Do YOU have an idea for a new university club? Are YOU ready to become a club leader? Bring your fresh idea to the Dean's office and YOU just might change BCU forever!!!"

I stared down at the flier, taking in the bold print and cheesy, cartoon graphics depicting tennis balls and calculators. The wheels in the back of my mind started to spin; I didn't have a fresh new idea for a BCU club...but I knew someone that did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In the real world, letting Botany majors take care of trees in the place of certified arborists is always a bad idea. ALWAYS.


	7. Waring:Bad Puns Ahead

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One step closer to a happy ending

  My feet dangled off the edge of Rose's bed as I waited for her to chose a song. While we waited for our meeting with Dean Dewey, Rose had suggested that I come up to her room and hang out. I wasn't sure what she had in mind (yet I agreed anyway, for some reason).Rose wanted to play a "game" where she shows me a song she likes and then I show her one I like and so forth. Apparently it was a way to explore each others likes and dislikes through music. Or it was suppose to be anyways, every time I played Rose some of my music she immediately added it to one of her playlists before the song was even over.

  “All music is good, but yours is especially pretty," she had said with a shrug and a sweet smile.

  I didn't argue, most of my music was classical. On the other hand, Rose's tastes were incredibly diverse. Some songs, (mostly songs by someone named Mr.Universe) were loud and idealistic, others were upbeat pop songs, and a few were hauntingly sad. I saved a few of the softer love songs to my Ipod and Rose clapped her hands. 

  When the next song ended, I took a pointed look at my watch. “We should leave now so we're on time .”

  Rose turned off the music, slid off the bed and helped me gather all the poster boards for our presentation. She held open the door once again, and true to form, my face turned red. I didn't even have to be told to hold the rail again, my hand reached for it as soon as we started to descend the stairs.

  “Don't be nervous,” I said as we started to walk to the main building.

  “I'm not nervous.”

  “We've gone over our presentation a sufficient amount of times, and the BCU has had a club like this before, so there is nothing to be nervous about!”

  “But I'm not nervous! I'm very excited to do this with you!”

  “In fact, nervousness at this time would be an irrational deterrent to our success and-wait. What did you say?”

  “Pearl, do you want to hear a bad pun?”

  I frown but managed to slow my pace down slightly. “If you already know it's a 'bad' pun, why would you tell it to others?”

  “That's the genre of humor! Jokes that are so bad, they're good!”

  “That's an oxymoron.”

  “Okay, here is goes-did you hear about the man who lost his left side?”

  “No?”

  “He's all right now!” she said triumphantly. I shot her a quick smile.

  “That's a very clever play on words.”

  “Oh, no, you didn't laugh! Okay, maybe you'll like this one: what time is it when it is time to go to the dentist?”

  “When your appointment is scheduled?”

  “Tooth hurty!” Rose looked at me with a wide expectant smile; I wondered if my fake laugh would be convincing.

  “Alright, if that one didn't make you laugh, I know this one will! Why did the golfer bring two pair of pants to the game?”

  “Is it because the best way to avoid disaster is to always be prepared?”

  “No! In case he got a whole in one!”

  “That's very clever, Rose.”

  She wasn't satisfied with my compliment though, and continued to tell me word play puns throughout our walk until I said- “How do you remember all of these?”

  “Oh! Well, last year for my birthday, my son gave me a huge book of puns since he knows I love them! I've just re-read it so many times that I memorized them!” Hopes I didn't even know I had came crashing down. My stride faulted for a second before I composed my face and kept walking.

  “You...have a son?”

  “Yes! His name is Steven and he's the most wonderful boy on the planet Earth!”

  “If he's your son, I'm sure he is.” I said, and I meant it too, even though my blood went cold.

  “You're so sweet, Pearl!”

  “So, are you with him? Steven's father, I mean?” I could barely get the words out; I could only hope they sounded nonchalant.

  “Hm? Oh no, not any more.”

  I so desperately wanted to ask what happened but I settled for a respectful “I'm sorry.”

  “Don't be sorry, it was for the best! Greg belonged on a stage, touring around the world, and now we have Steven!” I looked up at her shiny eyes and sincere smile. She didn't seem to have the look of a distraught lover, she seemed happy. Hope started to creep through my veins again.

  “You should meet him some time! I know he'd love you!”

  “Wh-what?”

  “Hey, we're here!”

  I gaze up at the main building at took a deep breath. The walk to Dean Dewy's office took us through the main building's glass double doors, and up three flights of stairs. Neither of us said much, but Rose sung a pretty tune under her breath and I tried to calm my nerves.

_Rose will be there with you. She'll do most of the talking. Everything will go smoothly._

  Of course, as soon as I thought that, a million things that could go wrong fluttered around in my head. On the top floor, Dean Dewy's office was the one at the end of a long hallway. The door was a chipper baby blue with a simple gold DEAN DEWY door tag on it, but it seemed to loom over us. The gentle hand Rose placed on my shoulder did not help with the anxiety.

  "You're going to do great," I said, reminding myself that I was confident in Rose.

  "We're going to do great."

  Before I could argue, she reached out and knocked on the door.

  "Come in," came the reply from the other side of the door. Rose grabbed the handle and swung the door open, waiting for me to walk in. The room was cluttered to the point of not being functional, with filling cabinets, bookcases, and boxes lining all four walls. In the center of the room was a overly large desk that still managed to be cluttered despite it's size. There was an older computer, endless stacks of paper, and many pictures of the same teenaged boy. Two rickety looking chairs sat in front of the desk.

  "Welcome to the office of Dean Dewey ladies! What brings you two to this part of the wonderful Beach City University?"

  “We spoke on the phone? We made an appointment a few days ago for-” I said, feeling my panic rise.

  “Yes, yes, of course! I didn't forget! Take a seat, make yourselves comfortable!” Rose and I shuffle into the rickety seats, I titled the poster boards to lean against the chair's leg.

  “So...the two of you are here to talk to me about...”

  “Starting an environment protection club?” Rose said.

  “I was getting there!” He squinted. “ Don't we already have one of those?”

  “Unfortunately, the old environmental club was disbanded when the president graduated and no one took her place. We'd like to start other one!” I said, the whole sentence coming out all at once.

  “Hmmm. You know, I'm up for re evaluation as Dean of Beach City University, and an environmental club might look impressive. Besides the two of you, how many other people want to join?”

  “Two more, sir.”

  Rose gave me a quizzical look. Technically I hadn't asked Amethyst and Garnet yet, but they were good people and I was sure they'd want to fight for the environment. Besides, BCU clubs required at least four members.

  “Well, that's a start, but you'll need six.”

  “Six? But last year-”

  “And, if there is an environmental club, how much will it cost the university? Hm?”

  I took a deep breath and reminded myself that Rose had many friends that might agree to join the club. “We plan on doing fund-”

  “All club expenses will be covered by the Quartz family.” Rose interjected with a tone of finality.

  Dean Dewey nodded earnestly but I just stared. All expenses? By her family? What?

  “Where would this club be held?”

  “We were thinking of holding meetings in the campus garden, if that's alright with you,” she said.

  “That's a very cost-effective idea! And when do you want to meet?”

  “We were thinking of meeting from six to seven thirty on Thursdays.”

  He nodded again. “Well ladies, that all sounds fantastic! Come back with an official list of at least six members and I'll officially put your club in the system. Is that all?”

  “Of course not! We have poster boards with our planned schedules , our mission statement, official club name-”

  “Actually I was just going to put 'environmental club' in the club roster.”

  “Oh. Okay then. We still have a lot of valuable content on these boards if-”

  “Sure, sure, leave them here, I'll read them when I get the chance.” he sighed.

  “Although I don't know when that will be, the university board wants me to go over every new student file. All of them! Do you even know how long that will take?”

  “Um. A while?”

  Rose abruptly stood up. “Thank you for your time, Dean Dewey. We hope to speak with you again soon,” she said, polite as always.

  I stood too, resting the poster boards against his desk. Though I doubted he'd actually read them, it seemed such a shame to waste them.

  “Sure, sure! Drop by anytime,” he said.

  Rose took my hand, led me out into the hallway and softly closed the door behind herself. She faced me with a huge grin on her face.

  “You did a great job, Pearl!” My face heated up again.

  “And you did an immaculate job as well! Not that I expected anything else!”

  She laughed and threw her arms around me. I was effortlessly lifted off the ground and spun around. Her arms were soft and warm; I felt weightless.

  “We shouldn’t get too ahead of ourselves,” I said when she set me down, “we still have to find at least two other members. Could you ask some of your friends to join?”

  Rose’s smile faltered. “I can certainly try!”

  I nodded. “In the meantime, I’ll print up Save the Earth club posters and sign up sheets, there’s a bulletin board in the cafeteria we can put them on!”

  “Sounds great, Pearl! I can’t wait to see them! Hey,” she put her hand on my shoulder, “ I’m really proud of you.”

  “Whatever for?” I said, my voice about two octaves too high.  

  “Everything! For working so hard on this, for being so passionate, for being such  a good friend!”

  “Thank you, Rose.” I got the words out weakly, I hoped she knew how much I really meant them.

  “Hey, do you want to come back to my dorm and listen to music?”

  _Yes! Of course I’d love to!_ “Actually I have a schedule to keep, I need to study for my physics class.”

  “That’s okay; you’re such a good student!” she said.

  Was it just wishful thinking or was there a twinge of disappointment in her voice? Rose walked me back to my dorm and we bid each other goodbye, promising to meet up again soon. I turned the key to my dorm and swung open the door.

  “Amethyst? Are you here? I need to ask you-what are you doing on the floor?” She didn’t move from her face down position on the floor.

  “I’m having a problem and I thought lying on the floor might fix it.”

  “And how is that working out so far?”

  “I’m still lying on the floor; what do you think?” I walked over to her and sat down.

  “What’s wrong? Did we run out of cheese puffs again?”

  “Not funny P! I’m having a serious identity crisis!”

  “What happened?”

  “You wouldn’t understand,” she muttered into the kitchen tiles.

  “You could explain it to me,” I said, trying to put as much sympathy in my voice as possible.

  “Do you ever feel like...uh, kinda like there's a whole bunch of you that nobody gets?”

  “Oh Amethyst, most people feel like that sometimes.”

  “No! Ugh, no, I…just, sometimes I’m the Amethyst that everyone already knows, sometimes I’m a, um...a guy version of Amethyst, and sometimes I’m just Amethyst,”she flopped back down on the floor.  

  “Hmm, it sounds like your genderfluid, if my memory serves me right,” I said.  

  She sat up. “There’s a word for that?”  

  “Of course! Although you might was to do more research on your own to see if that’s the label you want to use.”  

  “So, now what? If I am…genderfluid, what does that mean?”  

  I shrugged. “Whatever you want it to, I suppose. I think for most genderfluid people, it means that on days when they are male, they present more masculine, and people would use he/him pronouns, and on days when-,”  

  “People would do that? They’d use different pronouns on the days that I wanted?”  

  “Well, I can’t vouch for everyone, but…your friends totally would! I will! Garnet will! And Rose to, I’m sure of it!”  

  Amethyst grinned. “Do I get to use different names to?”  

  “If you want! You can also stick to Amethyst if that’s what-”  

  “Okay, what if on guy days my name was Purple Puma? Wouldn’t that be cool?”  

  “We’ll work on that.”   She was quiet for a moment.

  “Thanks Pearl. For, y’know, talking to me and being nice and stuff.”  

  “What else are roomates for?”  

  “Anyways, what did you wanna talk to me about?” she said, standing up wandering into the kitchen.  

  “Oh! Rose and I are starting an environmental club! You’ll join, won’t you?”  

  “I dunno, sounds kinda dumb P. Will there be snacks?”   

  I hadn’t thought about it. “Yes! There will be tons of snacks! And sugary treats! And carbonated-,”  

  “Okay, okay, I’m in.”  

  “Really? Great! I’ll send you an email with the schedule and-,”  

  “Dude, just put a post-it-note on the fridge.”  

  “Right! I’ll just put a post-it-note on the fridge!”

  I crawled up onto my bed and fished through my book bag for my physics book. I flipped to the page I had bookmarked; but I was so excited my eyes glazed over the page. _Three down, three to go_.

  The next day, I sat outside of a boxing ring while Garnet threw heavy hits at a punching bag. In one fluid motion, she dropped to the floor and began stretching out. I anticipated a wait, so I sat cross-legged on the floor with my physics textbook. After some time, she strode over to one of the ring's posts and used it to hop over the ring's edge, landing gracefully on her feet. As she walked over to me, I closed my book and stood up.

  “Hey, Pearl.”

  “Good afternoon, Garnet!”

  “Did you come to watch me work out?”

  “Oh! Well, yes, sort of-”

  “What did you think?”

  I blinked. I had planned the conversation out in my head multiple times, but I hadn't expected it to take this turn.

  “You're a very talented boxer! Your technique is flawless.”

  She shook her head as she unstrapped her gloves.

  “But the real question is, did I look cool?”

  “Well, um, yes? It's hard not to look cool when your punching things.”

  She nodded, tossing her gloves into her gym bag. “Yes. So what did you really want to talk about?”

  “I know you're very busy, so I understand if you don't have the time, but Rose and I are starting an environmental club and I was hoping you'd join! Here, hold on I made fliers-,” I gushed, reaching for my satchel.

  “What time does it start?”

  “The environmental club will meet from 6 to 7:30 on Thursdays.”

  She nodded. “I'm done with practice by then, I can go.”

  “Really? I'm mean-right, thank you! I'll see you there!” She nodded and I saw her give me a dramatic wink before I said a quick goodbye and headed for my next destination.

  My next targets were harder to convince. I had been prepared for it, since I'd only seen Lapis and Peridot around a few times, but it would be easier to ask them than it would to ask random strangers. Probably.

  Peridot held the flier up to the light and scrunched her face. “But would we even do at an environmental club? Sit around and talk about how great leaves are?”

  “Uhm, no. It would more be an opportunity to plan events that would benefit the environment!”

  Lapis shook her head and softly closed her library book. “I don't think it would be a good idea to do something like that...Jasper might get mad.”

  “Oh, right I had the foresight to check and she'd have practice during our meetings. She wouldn't even have to know!”

  “It just seems really...hrmm. Boring! That's the word I'm looking for!”

  “I understand that an environmental club isn't everyone's forte...however! An environmental club would look spectacular on a job application!”

  “ Well, I guess as a marine biology major...it wouldn't hurt to have that on my resume,” Lapis said.

  Peridot, already trying to fold the flier into some mangled origami animal, muttered something in agreement.

  “Fantastic! I'll see you both there on Thursday!” I said, not managing to hide the big smile on my face. When I left the library, I pulled out my phone to text Rose.

  _Did you manage to get your friends to come?_

_No! :( :'(_

_It's okay!_

_We still have at least six members!_

_Really!!!_

_Who???_

_Amethyst, Garnet, Lapis, Peridot, you and I._

_Wow!!! That's amazing! I can't believe you managed to get all those people to join! You're the best Pearl!_

"No, you are," I muttered to myself.

_Well I don't know about all that...but thank you! I'll see you on Thursday!!!_

_I can't wait!!!_

  I smiled to myself again, feeling her warmth through the phone. Finally, everything was falling into place. Well, almost everything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! So for Amethyst's part, I tried to write how a genderfluid person that didn't know they were genderfluid would feel. As I'm not genderfluid myself, I am very sorry if I didn't get it right!!! See you all again soon (I hope)!!!


	8. Picking Rose Petals

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Why tell the gay truth when you can tell the heterosexual lie and be really sad about it?

  Our first Environmental Club meeting was a bit of a disaster. It wasn't because of poor planning or execution, it was the fact that no one could agree on _anything_. Peridot kept insisting that she should be the president, (despite my constant stating of the many logical reasons why Rose was the president), Garnet and Lapis argued about what would make a good first event, Amethyst was arguing with me about all the low sodium and sugar free snacks, and well, as sweet as it was, it wasn't all that helpful that Rose insisted on encouraging everyone to 'speak their minds'. Especially when their minds were _loud_. Despite all this, the Environmental Club eventually settled on a simple, traditional beach clean up for their first event.

  The next weekend the six of us (for some reason no one else responded to my volunteer sign-up sheets) headed to Beach City's crown jewel: the beach. Armed with an abundance of shiny, black trash bags, trash pick-er uppers, and a camera for publicity pictures, we scoured the beach for trash, and four hours later, the six of us were lying on the beach, physically exhausted and surrounded by full trash bags. The sand was so soft and the nice breeze washed over me. Rose was next to me, well, okay, everyone was next to me, but she was the closest and she was humming something soft and sweet. My eyes were heavy. It was such a nice place for a nap...I sighed softly. I allowed myself five more seconds, then forcibly peeled myself off my beach blanket.

  “Pearl?”

  “I'm going to start dragging trash bags up to the dumpster on the pier.”

  The rest of the club members groaned but started to get up. Rose bounced up and waved them off.

  “As the president, I'll help Pearl take care of this! You guys keep resting.”

  I blushed at the thought of Rose and I alone. We were at a beach; it was almost romantic! Besides the bags full of trash. I took a deep breath and reminded myself that now was not the time for those thoughts. Taking a firm grip on the two nearest bags, I threw one over each shoulder and started trudging up the sandy slopes of the beach. Rose followed me closely; she cutely (but perhaps ineffectively) had her arms bundled around an excessive amount of trash bags. We trudged back and forth, back and forth, until the pile of trash moved from the now pristine beach to the dumpster up on the pier. I let out a loud sigh of relief as I tossed the last bag in and almost stumbled backwards. I quickly straightened myself out, dusted my hands together, and gave Rose my best “you picked the right person to be you're Vice President” smile.

  “Thank you so much for all the effort, R-Madame President.”

  She laughed and gave me a dramatic bow. “I couldn't have done it without my wonderful Lady In Waiting!”

  I smiled. “Oh, Rose, those are too completely different political landscapes!”

  Thoughts of Rose in Victorian Era dresses, big and lacy yet form fitting suddenly filled my head and I was sure it was apparent on my face. I quickly turned back to the ocean. Suddenly, a lingering thought in my mind was pulled to the surface. Rose and riches.

  I turned back to her.

  "Rose, I've been meaning to ask...you said your parents were covering all the Environmental Club's expenses...and I was curious as to why? The club isn't a burden on them, is it?"

  The last thing I wanted was to become a burden on Rose's parents, and indirectly, a burden on Rose herself. It occurred to me that maybe I already was, maybe Rose only spent so much time with me because she pitied me. After all, everyone adored Rose. She had everyone to chose from, so why would she chose me? The thought put a lump in my throat.

  "If so," I said, forcing myself to continue, "I'm prepared to raise all our funds myself, and I have some excellent ideas for fundraisers-,"

  I was interrupted by her gentle laughter.

  "Don't be silly! You don't have to do anything, especially by yourself. My parents...they weren't good people. They didn't even care about the earth, and I'm not sure if they even really do now, but, well at least now they aren't actively trying to hurt it."

  I tried to wrap my head around what she was saying, logic it all out and say something smart yet comforting in response, but I felt like I was missing an important piece of the puzzle.

  "I...don't think I understand what you mean."

  She let out a soft sigh. "They were oil tycoons. Well, sort of, they did other stuff too, but when I was younger, they were really horrible oil tycoons. My parents did a tons of horrible things, all of which were destroying the earth, not to mention illegal. I decided to fight for the earth, and all of it living creatures! So, I used their trust in me as their daughter to gather information and then threaten to expose them in court to force them into doing good things for the earth. I still use the information from time to time, to convince them to support things like this. Although, I think I might not need to anymore. They run green energy manufacturing businesses now, and they didn't seem to mind financially backing the Beach City Environmental Club. You...don't mind do you?"

  I gazed up at Rose. Did I mind? Of course not. It sounded just like Rose, demanding and pushy but idealistically kind-hearted in the end.

  "No, I don't mind. I think that was very brave of you."

  "Thank you, Pearl." She said, smiling warmly.

  I quickly looked back at the sunset, and I heard her shift towards the sky as well.

  "The setting sun on the ocean is breathtaking, isn't it?" she said.

  "It's the prettiest one I've seen," I said.

  _Because I'm seeing it with you_ , I thought, though I kept silent.

  “We should head back soon,” I said, watching as the rest of the Environmental Club members run around the beach. Well, Peridot, Amethyst, and Lapis were running around in the shallow water, Garnet was still sitting; she seemed to be enjoying herself. Rose smiled.

  “Aww you're so strict, Pearl. I wanna stay here with you.”

  “It's going to get dark soon, not to mention cold. We really should get going,” I said, but even I thought I didn't sound convinced.

  In one smooth movement, her spot next to me was abandoned and she was behind me. Her arms wrapped around me, and her head rested gently on the top of mine-god she was so tall. Rose's fluffy pink hair draped over me and tickled my arms, and somehow I was surprised by it's floral scent.

  “If it gets cold, I guess I'll have to steal your body heat.” she chimed, as if it was the most natural thing to say.

  For once, I found myself wanting her to stop. I was going to get the wrong idea. Actually, I already had the wrong idea. Being so close to her, hearing her say such nice, easy to take the wrong way kinds of things, _learning about her family_ , it was too much. I needed to clear my head before I said or did something foolish. Again. I ducked out from under her arms and took a small step back, so I could face her but still have some distance between us.

  “I'm going to head back now, to get a head start on loading up the car. I'll see you down there, alright?”

  I turned to walk away but I only made it a few steps before Rose grabbed my wrist.

  “Wait! I'm sorry.” she called.

  I cringed. The last thing I wanted was for Rose to apologize. She did nothing wrong.

  “You didn't do anything wrong.”

  “No...no I did. I saw it on your face. Was it something I said?”

  She looked at me with such sincere, concerned eyes, I wanted to look away. That wouldn't have convinced her that I wasn't upset though, so I returned her gaze.

  "You didn't!" My voice was an octave too high. "It's just, we really need to start heading back."

  Rose shook her head, her curly pink locks swishing back and forth. "You don't have to lie for my benefit. It's okay, I want to know how you feel! I really do! I thought that I understood, but I didn't, so thanks for telling me. I really-"

  Something welled up inside of my chest and spilled out through my mouth; I was frustrated with being misunderstood and frustrated with Rose for so sweetly trying to understand and not getting it at all.

  "No! No, Rose, you didn't do anything wrong! You're just going to give me the wrong idea!" I said, unfortunately using the loudest tone I'd ever used with Rose.

  She blinked. I blinked. Was that...my voice? No, it couldn't be, because if it was my voice, then I had just said something very, very stupid, and ridiculously rash. But there was no sound of Rose apologizing for the loud tone, only the sound of the bitter cold wind whistling around us, so that meant, as illogical and utterly unfortunate as it possibly could be, that it was, in fact, my voice.

  Rose titled her head. "Wrong impression? Pearl what do you mean by that? What kind of impression?"

  Logically, scientifically, and reasonably, the Earth does not stop spinning, but looking at her concerned, expectant face, I swore I could feel the planet grinding to a halt. I could feel myself failing myself, and more importantly, failing Rose. Just as soon as things where falling into place, they were immediately falling apart and my mind was empty as for how to stop it. How did I tell her? How do you tell someone, another girl for that matter, that you were the most at ease yet somehow the most excited around them? And then, what happens next? What would Rose say to me? The most I could hope for was sympathy and a somewhat strained but continuation of our friendship. Would that make me feel any better or worse than I already felt? Or, even worse, was I overestimating Rose’s kindness? Maybe she wouldn’t want to be friends with me at all, maybe she’d stop speaking to me all together. I couldn’t swallow down the lump in my throat. Looking up at her, I searched for anything, anything, to say. I couldn’t. I couldn’t do it. I was a gay anxious coward and I couldn’t open my mouth and say it. My mind went blank.

  "Well...I just...about you. Well, I just-I don't like you very much."

  Her eyes widened. My mind raced, and yet, there was nothing there at all. What did I just say?

  "It's not that I _dislike_ you per say, but I didn't-don't want to be friends."

  Oh god what was I doing?

  "But you-,"

  " I know, I know, and it's because I thought you'd be a good leader. You are a good leader. And this, well, seemed like something you'd want to do, and it was something I wanted to do, so I figured we could do it together, but-um, personality wise, we just aren't that compatible.” I blurted out.

  What a horrendous lie. There was a no one better for me. And if there was, well, I didn't care.

  “You'll continue this group won't you? Even if we aren't close?"

  What was I doing? What was I doing? _What was I doing?_

  "O-of course."

  Her glassy brown eyes broke contact with mine that moment and she looked out over the pier. The rest of the environmental protection club started to break down our things and head back to Rose's car. I knew what I was doing. Even with a mind as blank as printer paper, my body knew what to do. It was fight or flight. The basics of human instincts. And I was always flight. Now and forever.

  "We should get back," I said.

  "Yes. We should. And, I...I apologize for assuming that-,"

  "You don't have anything to apologize for, Rose." I said, and started walking away.

  I couldn't hear it. I couldn't hear Rose apologize for so graciously letting me into her beautiful, amazing world. She followed behind me a few paces, thankfully far back enough so that she couldn't see my face. I needed to hold it in, wait until I got back to my dorm to fall apart. But more than anything, I needed to push Rose far,far,far back into the corners of my mind because all I could think about was her glassy brown eyes and how I would do anything, everything I could to make that look go away. But I couldn't, no matter how much I may have wanted to. I was flight, always flight, now and forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry, so very sorry about how long this took. I love you all, I will try to get the last chapter out as soon as possible, but uh, realistically it'll probably be another five months, for reasons such as, "I suck, as a human being,". (It won't be five months. I will try so very hard for it not to be another five months). Love y'all, see you guys again super soon!!!


	9. Your Heart is Not a Motorcycle, That's Probably a Good Thing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The truth finally comes out! Will it go well?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!!! This is the final chapter of A Different Kind of Dream, and I just have to say, ~w o w~. It's been two years since I started writing this, and I feel like I've grown so much as a writer through out this entire journey! The most important thing I learned was about properly outlining work before starting. When I first started writing this, I was a very new writer that figured I'd just write freely, so I quickly got lost, overwhelmed, and started to dread writing this fic. I've learned my lesson, and my next project is guaranteed to be outlined properly and have a consistent update schedule. However, for now please enjoy this suuuper long chapter as an apology for my terrible update schedule!

  The next day, I sat cross legged on my bed with an open physics book on my lap, but I wasn't seeing a single word. It wasn't for lack of trying, I had read over the material many times and even tried reading it out loud (much to Amethyst's annoyance) but I wasn't seeing anything.

  _What did I do?_

  I pulled out a notebook and started taking notes, hoping it would help me actually absorb the information. A few minutes later, I had three pages of neat, organized notes, that I simply had no recollection of writing. Frustrated, I closed the notebook and the textbook and slid them to the far end of my bed. Falling back onto my pillow, I stared up at the ceiling, trying hard to focus on the bumps in the paint instead of Rose's hurt face the day before. I counted 36 bumps before I got distracted and had to start over again. It was a long night.

  Come Monday, I got up and got ready for class as if it were any other day, but I felt more nervous than I did on the first day of school. Botany class. Rose's class, Botany class, the class in which I sat next to Rose. It was my first class of the day, at 11:00. My heart sank down into my shoes. Amethyst and I went down to the cafeteria together, but they was unchracteristicly quiet, which didn't help my anxiety.

  “Hey, P,” they said as we neared the cafeteria entrance, “are you okay? It's been a whole day plus this morning and you haven't tried to explain something dumb and nerdy to me once.”

  “Physics isn't nerdy. It's a subsection of science with no human characteristics attached just like any other subsection of science,” I sighed, trying to avoid their question.

  “That’a girl,” Amethyst said, giving me an affectionate punch on the arm. We headed into the cafeteria, me forcing myself to press forward despite my legs feeling like lead. It's not like I could put off eating forever just because Rose would be there. It was favorable, but just not physically feasible. The cafeteria was crowded as always, but it seemed more overwhelming than usual. Louder. Busier. Dirtier.

  I didn't look for Rose’s massive pink hair in the crowd, I forced myself not to. Instead, I let myself fall slightly behind Amethyst and allowed them to lead me through the breakfast line.

_There’s so little room,_ I thought to myself. Every time someone bumped into me, every unfortunate but necessary invasion of personal space, every small, irrelevant clink of metal against meal trays, it was all ridiculously amplified to the point where sound felt like ants crawling under my skin. Was the whole day going to be like that?

  I didn't pay any attention to where Amethyst was leading me. Why would I? Most mornings I ate with just Amethyst and Garnet, and sometimes just Amethyst. Since I was so wrapped up in replaying the events that had taken place that day, I had forgotten about why Rose and I were out on the beach that day anyways: the formation of the Environmental Club. Amethyst had carelessly lead me into a fatal trap: a cafeteria table occupied by every last one of my new friends. Cluelessly taking a seat next to Garnet, I was left frozen in place for an awful second. The whole table’s conversation had come to a halt when Amethyst and I arrived and then they were all suddenly looking at me expectantly, even Rose. She met my eyes for a split second, then offered a small smile. There was something about that mere millisecond in time that metaphorically froze all my blood in my veins. As if my body was a rubber band that had been snapped, I immediately took a seat next to Lapis.

  The conversation continued. I heard myself say things, but I don't remember what they were. I don't even think I remembered what they were while I was saying them. Was I going to feel that way for the whole rest of the year? No...the whole...rest of my life? We didn't look at each other for the rest of the meal. I excused myself first, anxious to head to class before her so we didn't have to walk together, but really, it made little difference. Since there was no assigned seating, we didn’t sit together. I sat at the front of the class, trying hard to take notes, but my hand didn't move automatically like it didn't in Physics class. Each individual hair on my body stood straight up; my page in my notebook became messy with crossed out words.

_She's looking at me._

_She’s looking at me._

_She’s looking at me._

  _She_ _hates me!_

_And I deserve it!_

  I wondered throughout most of class if that last part was true. Rose didn't hate anybody...but there was always a first time for everything. The idea that I was the first person she'd ever hated replayed again and again in my head until I was subconsciously biting at my fingernails, an unsanitary habit I'd successful quit two years ago.

  The end of class couldn't come soon enough. Instead of neatly organizing my materials into my book bag, like a responsible student, I crammed them all in at once. I’m not proud to admit it, but I fled that room in a manner that was disrespectful to both the professor and my peers. It was uncharacteristic and childish with Rose potentially watching but I couldn't help it, being in a room with Rose, who was not speaking to me, was physicality suffocating.

  The rest of my day went by quickly; unlike Botany class I wasn't really aware of my surroundings. Soon I found myself back in my dorm and settled in for bed when I could have sworn I was in class only a few minutes prior.

  I wish I could say the days that followed were any less pathetic, but I still felt the same, day after day. Still, the world did not change. It didn't stop spinning for me, just because I wasn't ready to move forward.

  Club meetings were especially hard on me. As her vice president I had to sit next to her, hear her voice so close to me, almost smell her heavy rose scent. It was like I was a poorly built bridge, ready to collapse at any moment. I felt heavy, though I tried to convince myself that is was psychosomatic. Either the members of the Environmental Club were oblivious or my acting skills were superb. If I gambled, I’d put my money on the first one.

  Days passed in that melodramatic yet understated state. Then weeks. A month. Then two. I fell into a rhythm where I kept busy enough to not think about it. Or think about how happy I was just a short while ago. Or how I ruined it. It was exhausting work.

  On another nameless day, I was walking towards the library when I heard a commotion in the distance. My eyes scanned the campus for the source of the sound; the noise seemed to be coming from the Diamond dorms. The Diamond dorms were notorious for being the nicest dorms there were, housing only the richest of students. Technically that kind of segregation was illegal but there was some loophole in the bylaws that made the diamond dorms both possible and coveted. The Zircon twins would probably know about it.

  Filling up the walkway that surrounded the second floor dorms, there was a large group of students milling around one of the rooms. With my full attention now on the dorms, I noticed even more students heading up the stairs in twos or groups until the entire surrounding area was packed, like they were waiting in line for a concert.

_What could be so interesting that it could distract such a great number of students from their studies?_ I thought to myself, unthinkingly heading in that direction. As I was heading up the stairs, something white caught my attention in the corner of my eye. Immediately I dropped down to snatch the litter off the ground before it ended up in the ocean or something, but before I found a recycling bin, the bold print on the flier caught my attention. In light pink block letters the flier read:

  **School Transfer Sale**

**All things must be sold**

**All prices moderate and negotiable**

**At Diamond Dorm 214 on Tuesday, at 5:00 PM**

Oh, _that explains it_ , I thought to myself. A sale of items that furnished a luxurious Diamond Dorm at reasonable prices would easily cause a riot. I turned to leave, but suddenly, I froze in my tracks. Diamond Dorm 214? But...isn't that Rose’s dorm?

● ● ●

  I didn't attend Botany class the next day. I didn't attend any lectures that day, for that matter. Telling Amethyst I was too sick for class, instead of studying I paced back and forth in our dorm for quite literally hours.

  _Rose was transferring schools? Because of what I said to her? No...she wouldn't transfer just over that...would she? I can't see Rose anymore? Ever?_  

  The same five thoughts circled around and around in my head. There was no logical way out. No plan I could come up with to find a way out of this. I didn't even understand what was going on. My throat was tight. I wanted to go back in time, take back what I said. Staying by Rose’s side forever as just a friend was a thousand times less painful than the feeling in my chest, but it was just too late. I couldn't think of a way to explain myself without having to explain why I lied...if she really was leaving over that. I tightly clutched the book I didn't know I had picked up. It was just too late.

  In the blink of an eye 5 o' clock had come and Amethyst was turning the key to the door. I scrambled back to my bed and propped open the book in my hand.

  “Heya P,” Amethyst sang, breezing into the living room with a white bag in their hand, “ I didn't know if you-wait a second, are you studying? On a sick day?”

  “Y-yes?”

  They snorted. “What a weirdo. Anyways, you want some soup? I brought you some soup.”

  They triumphantly placed the styrofoam cup on the counter and fished out a spoon from the silverware drawer for me. I slid off my bed and sat at the table. Prying open the lid, I frowned. “Did you...eat half of this?”

  “No,” they said, pulling out Oreo's from the cabinet.

  “But it's half gone. And there's a bite mark in the styrofoam.”

  “Look, do you want half a soup or not?”

  I bit back half a laugh. “You’re right. Where are my manners? Thank you for the half a soup Amethyst.”

  They nodded, somehow fitting three Oreos in their mouth at the same time. “Yooourr'e wolcome.”

  The following day, I attended our Environmental Club meeting. Amethyst was showing a grossed out yet interested Lapis and Peridot how much Mountain Dew she could drink in under a minute, Garnet and Rose were having a quiet conversation off to the side, and I was busy pretending to go over the minutes from last meeting. I tried very hard to remain calm. I must have misheard her when she told me her dorm number, because looking at her interact so easily with the group, it was obvious she had no intention of leaving. To be honest, I felt a pang of jealously towards my friends, I wanted so badly to talk comfortably with Rose again.

  Rose decided to start the meeting at five minutes past six. Peridot immediately tried to pitch an idea to the group about giant environmental robots that protected the planet, by force, ‘lots and lots and lots of force’ but before I could even mention our lack of funds for such a project, Rose cut her off.

  “We all look forward to hearing your very creative idea in a second Peridot, but first, I have an announcement.”

  _Oh Rose, don't encourage her_ , I thought to myself. It took me a second, but once I realized what she said, my heart beat sped up and the lump in my throat returned like a woodpecker to a dead tree.

  “Unfortunately, I will have to step down as the Environmental Club president, as I will be transferring to Warsell University on Saturday.”

  The room was silent, but not from my perspective. It was too loud, with only but my gunshot loud heart beat echoing off every white wall. The finer details of the room were falling out of my sight, the white walls were closing in on me. What was it Garnet taught me? 8-4-7 breathing? Or was it 4-8-7? Breathe. I couldn't breathe.

  The room came alive with questions for Rose a second later.

  “Why are you transferring?” That was Lapis, I think.

  “My parents, they’re making me transfer, Warsell is closer to home.”

  _That's a lie. You have your parents wrapped around your finger._

  “You’re really leaving Saturday? This Saturday?”

  “I am. I’m heading down to Dionta City at three.”

  Their voices sounded weird to me. Like they were far away. Like it wasn't happening to me. _Oh please don't let it be happening to me._

“What's going to happen to the club?” Was that Peridot? Amethyst?

  “I’m so glad you asked! Fortunately, I’m leaving you in the very capable hands of our Vice President and rightful founder of the Environmental Club! Pearl, can you come up here for a second?”

  I’m not sure why she asked, as if I was some stranger she needed to sell to the group. They already knew who I was. My feet moved on their own, I found myself standing beside her. I’d had enough anxiety in public to know how to smile convincingly in front of people, so I did. Rose kept talking. She was saying something about how much she would miss us, then, something about the fighting spirit of the Environmental Club. _It’s just a club_ , I thought to myself. But she just kept on talking.

● ● ●

   When Saturday came, I wasn't ready for it. It came anyways. We all went down to the Diamond dorms to help her load her car. Well, not exactly. Apparently we need exactly as many supervisors as we did workers, so Amethyst, Peridot, and Lapis ‘supervised’, while Garnet, Rose and I loaded the car. When we were done, we presented her with a bouquet of light pink roses and a card, which I have no recollection of signing, but it was apparently signed by all of us. Over the course of the prior few weeks, I had been trying not to look at her as much as possible, but as Rose stood there, fawning over her card with the dozen roses pressed gently to her soft cheek, I couldn't tear my eyes away. We were just two people out of 7.1 billion; why did it feel like the world was ending?

  The moment passed. Sensing it was almost time for her to leave, everyone told her how wonderful she was, how much they’d miss her, how Warsell was lucky to have her. I felt bitter. They didn't even know her a fraction of as well as I did. I needed to say something too, but I didn't. No one seemed to notice.

  She hugged everyone in the group goodbye, even me. It caught me off guard, but I guess it would have been strange to the group if I was the only one she didn't hug. I was buried in her warmth without any warning; but immediately I was overwhelmed with it. I wasn't just happy, it felt like I was breathing again after months of holding my breath. I got a whiff of her hair though, still perfectly scented like roses, and immediately I was pushing her off me. She looked startled. I looked down.

  “You better hit the road,” I said dryly, “ so you don't hit 5pm traffic. It's horrendous.”

  She smiled at me, but her soft brown eyes were blank. “Okay, Pearl. I will.”

  “Goodbye everyone, it was really wonderful knowing you!” she called, waving us goodbye before getting into her black Camaro. We all waved back as she shut the door and started the engine. I blinked, and suddenly she was driving away. I blinked twice more and then I couldn't see her car on the street anymore. There was a few seconds of silence that fell over all of us. Amethyst was the first to break it.

  “Hey P...are you feeling okay?”

  “Pardon? Oh, yes, I’m perfectly fine, why wouldn't I be?”

  “Well...uhhh. You’re crying.”

  “Oh, Amethyst don't be ridiculous I’m not-,” I said, but I was stopped short when I held a hand up to face and felt my wet cheek.

  “Pearl,” Garnet said, placing a firm hand on my shoulder, “it's time for you to stop hiding from yourself.”

  “I-I’m not-,” I tried, but I gave up quickly. I knew she was right, even if I’d never thought about it that way. I sighed. “Even if that's true, it doesn't have anything to do with Rose, and I’d really appreciate it if-."

  “Whatdayamean it’s got nothing to do with Rose? Of course it does!” Amethyst chimed in.“Everything about you has to do with Rose! And she feels the same way! You’re just to busy living up in Pearl World to notice!”

  “That’s not, no-,”

  “Yes it is! All of the sudden, you two stopped being all lovey-dovey and then you both got super sad and we've all noticed-,”

  My heart stopped. “She's been...sad lately?”

  The group looked at me like I'd just admitted to being incapable of doing simple addition. “Uhhh, yeah. You seriously didn't notice? She hasn't smiled for real in like, months. Look, she’s leaving, and you love her, and she does love you too! Are you really okay with her never knowing forever and ever? And hey! What do even have to lose? She's transferring,even if things go bad, you'll never see her again!”

  I felt like I had been struck by lightning. My mind wasn't producing coherent thoughts, but my body was suddenly ready for action. She was right. Maybe not about Rose loving me too, but about wanting Rose to know that I did. I felt like it was on the tip of my tongue every time I spoke to her, I was always in danger of letting it slip out. I thought it was fine, but as soon Amethyst said it I realized how much I really, really wanted to tell her. Frantically I looked for Rose’s car, which had completely disappeared. However, something else shiny caught my eye. Jasper. Or rather, her vehicle. She was there too, at the far end of the parking lot, putting up the kick stand for her motorcycle. The idea hit me like the apple that fell on Sir Newton’s head, and though I have no idea how it's possible, it didn't even occur to me how absolutely insane it was until the next day. Instead of thinking, I started running. By the time Jasper heard the footsteps and looked up, I was skidding to a halt.

  “What the?” Jasper snapped.

  “I need to borrow your motorcycle,” I said, not stopping to catch my breath. I reached for the handles.

  Jasper grabbed my arm. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

  “I need to borrow your motorcycle.”

  “Have you lost your-,”

  “Hey, listen. You’ve been really horrible to me, to all of us. But it’s never too late to start over again, and make amends. So to start, let me use your motorcycle,” I said quickly.

  She froze in shock for a second then opened her mouth to say something, but I threw my leg over the seat of the bike.

  “Wait a second! Do you even know-,”

  “Don’t worry, I’ve read the owner's manual for one before!” I called over my shoulder, flipping on the kill switch and twisting the key, already in the ignition.

  Jasper yelled something else but I couldn't hear her over the bike’s roar. I twisted the grip with a hard yank, which threw the motorcycle forward instantly. It continued to rip away from Jasper as I let out a high pitched scream. In fear, my grip on the throttle loosened and the bike slowed a tiny bit but still pressed forward. As I came to the end of the parking lot, still screaming, I realized that I wasn't angled right to clear the mouth of the parking lot. In an attempt to turn, I violently twisted the handles. My hand clamped down on the grip and suddenly I was flying towards the curb. The motorcycle sped off the curb like it was a ramp and threw me back onto the road. I stopped screaming at that point, but only because I had run out of oxygen.

  Somehow the bike had landed upright and continued to carry me forward. My hand had an iron grip on the handlebars but slowly, I managed to loosen the hold my shaking hand had on the grip before I got to the ramp that led to the highway. Vaguely, I thought about the motorcycle helmet I had left clutched in Jasper's hand. My heart was pounding, but from there I managed to gently turn the handlebars to steer down the ramp. I blinked tears out of my eyes.

  Still shaking, I merged onto highway 24X as carefully as possible. Once I was on the open road, I forced myself to start looking for her car on the highway. _Blue Honda, white Sudan, black Toyota_ , I thought. As I sped up to an acceptable speed for the highway, the wind hitting my face felt like knives.

  A sinking feeling in my stomach crept up to me as I continued to look for her car; I realized I might not even be on the right highway. Reason started to catch up with me too, I could barely control the bike, I didn't know where I was headed, and most importantly, the bike was only kind of ‘borrowed’, I was definitely paying for any damage done to it while riding it. Just as I was beginning to lose hope, I saw her car.

  “Rose!” I wailed, seeing a black Camero merge onto I-27z.

  This time I purposely clutched the throttle and sped up, screaming once again as the bike raced ahead. The stretch of highway in front of me was bare, thankfully, so no one was bulldozed out of the way by my rapid acceleration. Within a matter of seconds I’d caught up to her black Camero; in that moment I was ecstatic. Only for that moment though, because I passed her within seconds. I froze, suddenly hit with the realization that I didn't know how to stop. I continued to accelerate, my body locked into place and my mind wiped blank of everything I knew about motorcycles.

  _Brake. Brake. Use the brake to stop. Where’s the brake_ , I thought, but I couldn't pull up an image of a brake in mind no matter how hard I tried. Everything was muddled. I knew I was losing Rose, and I knew I was in danger, but I couldn't think over the sound of my pounding heartbeat. I’ll have to stop eventually, right? When I run out of gas… I didn't finish that thought, instead my attention was snagged by a road sign that read Ramp 45 Left Exit. And then it clicked. Left! The brake was on the left. Maybe it was the fact the Rose was quickly disappearing behind me, or the fact that I was still accelerating, but still, to this day, I don't know why I thought my next actions would work. In my terror tainted state, I knew that I needed to slow down before breaking, but my mind failed to tell me how to do that properly. Instead, I snapped and made a sharp right turn off the highway. The motorcycle and I flew into the grass, then I slammed down on the left brake. My body lurched forward hard, with the bike me throwing off.

  _Thud_.

● ● ●

  Everything was black. Blacker than the empty space that held up the stars and the planets and just as quiet. Where was I? I tried to move a hand, only to find out that I couldn't feel it. Or feel anything, for that matter. Suddenly, there was a loud burst of noise. I strained to make out what it was, but the sound was too garbled. Where was that coming from? My side? No. Above me?

  Seconds passed. It felt like someone was pressing down on my face. With a brick? Bright white light flooded my eyes. I gasped. At least I think it was me. I blinked rapidly. It took my eyes a minute to adjust to the light, but as soon as they did, all of my feeling came back at once.

  “Ahhhah,” I groaned. Every part of my body felt like it had been smashed with that brick from a few seconds earlier.

  “Oh my god Pearl, are you okay?” someone cried from my left.

  Rose? I was still looking straight up at the sky but I tried to turn my head. White hot pain raced up and down my neck and I could feel the heavy blackness from before edge around my mind. However, I was determined.

  After a long combination of slow, small movements, I was finally looking up at her, my head resting on what felt like grass.

  “Rose?” I croaked.

  Her stunned face crumpled immediately; she said something inaudible.

  “I need to tell you something,” I said. Something in the back of my head told me that it wasn't the right time, but that voice was drowned out by the sound of t.v static and Rose's big brown eyes; they looked watery.

  She jumped, blinking a few times. “S-stay there, I’m going to go get help,” she said, getting up.

  “No! Don't go,” I said, sitting up suddenly and grabbing her arm.

  Blistering pain racked through my whole body and my vision went white for a second. Still, I held on, though I was sure I was seconds from blacking out again.

  “Pearl-you need,-I need to get you-,”

  “I have to tell you something, it can't wait,” I said.

  And I meant it. As I sat there in the grass, everything inside me jumbled and/or broken, I couldn't ignore my gut feeling that it was now or never. I didn't give her a chance to respond.

  “I...lied, before, when I said I didn't want to be friends. I think I hurt you, and I’m sorry, and I only said it because I was scared. Scared...because when I’m with you I feel excited, and calm, and important, and...happy. Rose, you make me feel everything. I just wanted to make you feel the same way, but I was so scared I couldn't that I ran away, but now, I think that....,” I said, gasping as I ran out of breath, “that it's okay. No matter how you feel, I’m still grateful I got to be part of your life. I still want to tell you...how I feel about you. You are the most wonderful person I’ve ever met. I’m in love you. Thank you for letting me be a part of your life.”

  Still watching her face, I exhaled. I wanted to collapse back onto the grass, but I couldn't look away from her face. At first, it was completely blank. A second passed. And then another. Then, all at once, her face softened and tears dripped down her face. She gently wrapped her arms around me in a soft hug, then slowly guided me back into a lying down position. I protested weakly but fell silent when I felt her press a soft kiss to my forehead.

  _Oh. It's so warm_.

  Any thoughts in my head immediately vanished and my heart starting beating as hard as it had on the motorcycle. Rose pulled away.

  “Pearl, you have no idea how much I love you, but I’m going to have plenty of time to tell you about it at the hospital.”

● ● ●

   “So there you have it. The complete story of how your mother and I fell in love,” I finished triumphantly.

  Only Steven’s eyes poked out from under the covers but I could tell he liked the story; there were invisible stars in his eyes. He pushed the covers away to free his whole face. “What? Nooo, it can't be over! What happened next?”

  “Well, I assume your mother called 911, but I can't really be sure because I blacked out again a few seconds later. Steven, don't ever, ever, drive a motorcycle without proper instruction first. Or a helmet. Ever. I could have died.”

  “Okay...I won't. But what happened to aunt Jasper's bike anyways? Did you ever find out Garnet's major? And did you ever go to space like you wanted?”

  “It was severely damaged, but Rose bought her a brand new one if I remember correctly. Your aunt Garnet was studying to become the marriage counselor that she is today. And yes, but that's a bed time story for another night. For now, it's time to go to sleep.”

  “Aw...c’mon! Just one more story!” Steven protested, but he was already sinking back down onto bed.

  “Rules are rules for a reason. After all, you don't want to be tired on pancake day, do you?” I fake chided while tucking him in.

  “No! Goodnight, Aunt Pearl!”

  “Goodnight, Steven,” I said, giving his hair one last ruffle before I turned off the lamp on the nightstand. I slipped out of his room quickly, shutting the door behind me as softly as I could. I didn't think about it much when I was telling Steven the story, but I couldn't help but be amazed at how different my life was back then. Or more importantly, how much I had changed since then. Looking back at Steven’s bedroom door, and then across the hall to Rose’s and my room, I couldn't help but be endlessly grateful that I’d had such a different kind of dream all those years ago.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the support, everyone!!! It means the world to me!


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